Glad to see Sara motivated

Sat, May 15, 2010
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woke up early at N's place. After a deep sleep. Saw Saras mail, she was feeling much better and thanking me for the positive words of motivation. Thats a nice feeling to have made some one happier.

Sara is such a nice gal an example of a struggling Canadian person against all odds. Studying, working full time, paying for her tution. Then getting into an accident while she was biking, hurt and not able to pursue her favourite activity of going for long distance running every day. And on top of all this, her dad passed away. So much of emotional distress and still fighting against all odds to succeed with a cheerful happy smile and face.

Feeling a bit better after the motivating talk from Narayan. Who always suppored Eva. Eva is feeling like a spoilt princess there in India with all the attention. And hence her feeling of power. Where as i am reminded at every step of the US trip we took together and feeling nostigalic with all the green nature around me and been all alone with out the distractions of TV.

And also thankfull that we did not end up having any bad accidents during the trip. which was a huge possibility given the discovery of the faulty bolt on the passenger side wheel of the vehicle. Would have been a major accident and collapse of the passenger side and I would Not have been able to forgive myself if something bad would have happened to Eva.

She on the other hand is surrounded by people who are considering her exotic and maybe also people who as a general opinon about the western women been easy to jump into bed with. well what one does when in power is something that will tell about her own character. And power currupts even the best of people.

Had great break fast of home cooked dosas at N's house. Great way to distract from continously thinking about Eva and feeling that sense of still been connected to her. And then the feelings of her been in some kind of danger.....

Like N said. its her own foolishness of her age, even we all have gone thru that phase and made decisions then. And most of the time regreted and wished that there was someone to tell us and would have stopped us.
Just that not to wonder how could she get so cold hearted and cut off things so easily. As with time people realise what they did wrong latter and by then its would be too late for her.

ITs not in our powers to change.

Which is a fact given that I think the same about my power and ability. Just have to let it go and hope for the best.
Really not even able to get angry with her at all . If i could get angry at her like I did to the other exs it would have been so easy to cut her off.

Just feel that she is doing things in her naiveity and been stupid.

And she is still fooling her self into believing that I made some imaginary stories and told Amit , she did not even bother to confirm with me about the stories.
Well she trusts him and his words more... thats a choice she made.

Had great home cooked food, by N's wife. yuummmyy,, nothing beats home cooked food. Having food outside and tasting exotic food is good for sometime. But then Home is where we all come back to. Like the harbour we as ships keep coming back to.

Watched "life in metro" hindi movie about life and affairs of the heart in mubai. Feels to true and how things are now in Mumbai and Bangalore.

Not the type of life style I would like. But surely felt a relation to the guy who was getting used by his bosses to use his apartment for their sexual adeventures. Felt a relation with him in terms of his crush on a gal who seems to be so not aware about his interest and love for her.