Docs appointment and then to NJ

Sat, May 8, 2010
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wake up with intermittent sleep. Then get out of sleeping bag around 7am.

And today the guys at work are having the Ghost hunt. Well i have docs appointment @ 9:30. So it kind of feels bad but have to do whats priority. Something I think I should learn a lot from Eva. She is so focused, wish that she had a little more focus on me, when we were together and things would have happened different. But hey she is who she is. Only she can change her own attitude. No one else can, and even if they make it will temp and will have very different side effects.

Just like me telling her that I cannot live with someone who kisses other guys on the lips. Its not cultural, nor anything external. ITs just that I cannot handle the jealous feeling and sick feeling of seeing something that I hold precious and very close to my heart. The purity of our relationship with its exclusive features always reserved for that one person only. And kissing on the lips happens to be very exclusive feature I think should only happen between who are in a relationship and are in exclusively in love.

Other wise its like any other one night stand or open relationship. There is nothing special in that.

Well back to the original story, so me telling her that I cannot live with someone who goes around kissing other guys on the lips and her getting very angry and abusing me and telling me mean things at that moment. And then latter trying to compromise with no real conviction. saying okay that is just a small thing. And the worst, "he (raymondo) will understand".. whats that supposed to mean? So out goes all the heated arguments she put across about the culture thing. hehehe, he was just there to seduce her and he was trying to work his way to just have sex with her by making the kiss the first step in breaking down her defence..... Well some gals will never learn.

Either Eva will become one of those gals who will either be going around the world having 1 month affairs or maybe have a sudden change of attitude and settle down with someone she really loves.

well so much for early morning sat thoughts. ahh there you go, the paradox of a women who seems to have extraordinary focus and then been a drifter and low in values, when it comes to ethics and relationship..... Well that thing about values may have saved me from making a huge mistake. But hey there were flags all along the way. But again those were things that could easily be worked out had she been open to communicating and discussing and not getting angry and throwing up a tantrum every time things did not go her way.

Crux of a relationship, is in both people been open to sit down and talk no matter how uncomfortable the situation feels. Thou she felt nice to hear me openly communicate, she had little inclination to openly and honestly communicate with me. Blamed it on her conservative upbringing, to relationship disaster with Mirav, Louis as her inability to openly express herself....
yea right, Blame every one but ones own attitude of thinking that lying and avoiding giving out information, is a great way to go about establishing TRUST in a relationship.

Hopefully people will realise that not openly revealing or only partially reveling is also equal to LYING and its not been fully honest. And soon the cracks caused by that will result in the collapse.

Went to the Hospital @ 9am with viki. There was an Indian doc there turned out to be from Tamil Nadu and another student doc again hot Indian gal following her around.

get the doc from there and then get home. pack up and head towards temple in New Jersey.
reache temple around 11:45am. The doors to the Gods sanctuary was closed and there was the weekly sat pooja going on. Opened up at 12:10. Then had some food at the canteen and headed towards Narayans house.

Again since his wife had cooked, we had to eat the lunch there.

Gave narayan the receipt for the Scotia bank that he needs to take to the US consulate in Ottawa. And towards night he realises that he needs another one for his wife too...
Hopefully he can get it done there on Monday morning.

Watched the movie "house full" again the main character Akshay Khanna reminded me of myself. Gals coming into my life to use me as a stepping stone..... wonder when my luck will ever change... Then see "page 3" about life in mumbai and show business and business world...