I am afraid to love again

Saturday Aug 20 2016

Another bit of creative gushing out of emotions... 

.... afraid to love again

I am afraid

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who does not care about me
As much as I care about her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who does not love me
As much as I love her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who does not think about me
As much as I think about her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who ignores me
As much as I am focused on her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who will never love me
As much as I love her.

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who will only hurt me
As much as I adore her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who dances with a closed heart
As much as I dance with my heart

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone

Copy Rights Vi V (Sep 2014)

Lazy warm days some would love to have

Sunday Aug 16 2015

Lazy warm days some would love to have ....

Ahhhhhh my fav Merengue at last after a very long time... Bonus dancing with a curly haired beauty smile emoticon

Followed by an amazing Cumbia... wow what a night at Border line ,, after a very very long time smile emoticon

Sep 07 2014, ONAM Sunday / Sadhya ,, off to 1000oaks

Sunday Sep 07 2014

Onam....
what an emotional day it was yesterday,,, with raised hopes and expectations ,,, all coming crashing and then raising again and then crashing again.
feeling of wanting to love someone special and to be loved back in return ,,, desperation and what not.... talked with Anl,, who was advising me to start the search the traditional way ,,,, again,, not in a situation to do that at this age... too late.

And the connection on the dance flr with alb,,,,, driving me crazy ,,, addictive ,,, wanting more...  and as per the laws of fuck up that governs my life.... nothing seems to happens was I would want ideally,, not even close to remote... causing more tension and drama than any happiness, love and peace.
REminds me again about....

28 August at 15:52 

Note to Self : Stop barking (chasing) up the wrong tree ..,,, again and again. ... please just LEARN,, already,,,,Just trust your basic instinct, have some self discipline and self respect and walk away...
Somethings are not ment to be. If it was ment to be, it will happen smoothly and effortlessly, with out any drama 

Just have to be carefull again about dancing with my heart...., very very dangerous..... 

Now off to 1000 oaks to a new phase of life and start of life... lets see how that goes.

Cheers


Another bit of creative gushing out of emotions... 

.... afraid to love again

I am afraid

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who does not care about me
As much as I care about her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who does not love me
As much as I love her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who does not think about me
As much as I think about her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who ignores me
As much as I am focused on her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who will never love me
As much as I love her.

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who will only hurt me
As much as I adore her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who dances with a closed heart
As much as I dance with my heart

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone

Copy Rights Vi V (Sep 2014)

Sep 05 2014..... afraid to love again

Friday Sep 05 2014.... afraid to love again

I am afraid

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who does not care about me
As much as I care about her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who does not love me
As much as I love her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who does not think about me
As much as I think about her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who ignores me
As much as I am focused on her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who will never love me
As much as I love her.

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone
who will only hurt me
As much as I adore her

Yes I am afraid to fall in love with someone

Aug 09 2014 , volunteer and movie

Saturday Aug 09 2014

went early morning around 9 to volunteer for the burrito making proj,  thou there was satsang and was thinking of staying back. Ended up taking the 100 burritos to Rescue mission center . and they needed more to as they feed about 300 plus people and more towards end of the month.

Towards evening decided to go for the movie

hmmmm interesting read :::
Someone who is truly interested in you will find an endless number of reasons why they must see you. 
Someone who is just playing around—or confused about their own feelings—will find an endless number of excuses why they just don't have the time. 

*******makes sense, ,,,, reminds me of the will smith quote ::
Don't chase people, Be yourself, do your own thing and work hard.
The right people,, the ones who really matter and belong in your life, will come to you . And Stay   

ok off to see the The Hundred-Foot Journey .. ideally would have loved to go with someone,,, but hey , life of newbie in a new town, just have to live the moment and do my own thing  ,, when the right people come in at the right time,, added bonus 

was asleep and around 11:30 woke up to see the msg from alb about going to some mexican place and asking if I would be there. too worn out for any expedition .. and it was funny how she chooses not to answer any direct questions? kind of a turn off and does not help build trust .... as avoiding to answer kind of constitutes a kind of walled lie.

Aug 06 2014 4th day in isolation

Wednesday Aug 06 2014

Its my 4th day in isolation at home. Trying to cut away all the temptation and glitter around me and trying to withdraw in , focus and get centered.

just went out for a bit for bank related work and was back.

only open was Facebook which I hope to eventually be able to cut down more.

Aug 04, loosy goosy way of life

Monday, Aug 04 2014

Its one thing to fall for someone, in a thunderbolt struck moment locked in eternity, seeing something amazing in them, imagining and creating a very endearing persona..... The very passing thought of their Eyes, Smile, Lips and cute Cheeks makes your heart beat faster, drenching you in waves of happiness and hope ....  
***********and another thing when you realize that you could never live happily with the real person, cause of their bitchy superiority talk, looking down on others and you, selfish, self-centered, loosy goosy woosy irresponsible princessy way of life, over critical, sarcastic,,,  

Its one thing to fall for someone, in a thunderbolt struck moment locked in eternity, seeing something amazing in them, imagining and creating a very endearing persona..... The very passing thought of their Eyes, Smile, Lips and cute Cheeks makes your heart beat faster, drenches you in waves of happiness and hope ....   ***********and another thing when you realize that you could never live happily with the real person, cause of their bitchy superiority talk, looking down on others and you, loosy goosy woosy irresponsible princessy way of life, over critical, sarcastic,,,