Tuesday , Aug 31 2010
---------------------
After a great monday night out salsa dancing at the Vango, was finding it tough to get up. Danced with all a bunch of people, mostly got asked by others to dance than me asking any.
Still feel my confidence and self esteem is at its low after the way Eva has been behaving/behaved with me. With me making efforts to smooth out the negativeity and her only trying to focus on just the negativitiy.
Well i tired like no man has ever, if she is just showing to me and her self that what she tries to show the outter world as a person into all kinds of philosophical and positive reading and posting on the blog and then goes on to the opposite of what she writes, then for sure she is not really who she portrays herself to be. Even to her self.
and like a fool instead of just ignoring sick people, I tend to get more concerned and want to do good to someone who is just ungrateful for all that I have done and sacrificed. Maybe its because I care too much,,,,, have to learn to care less for such people. But again the argument comes up, they are part of your life and you choose to take a chance. Is it bad on my own character to give up easily?..... or should I be as cold hearted as them?
It surely is affecting my own self-esteem and I am taking in her negative energy and looking at myself as a bad person. When in fact its the other way around, she is the one who is negative and still swimming in all kinds of fake, shallow, superficial show off state of mind.
Sure all her travel is great conversation material and to be made to feel great about it by people who are not into traveling to exotic places. Other than that, how can there be any spiritual growth when the foundation on which one is doing the travel is based on trying to just show off to less fortunate people.
As someone said, its " A real man doesn't love a million girls. He loves one girl in a million ways."
Thats also true to what ever one does, its does not matter how many different places in the world we travel in, as long as we can find happiness in one place, that is what matters. And that one place is within us, not at different places in the world.
So the same thing applies to me, I have to focus on my own happiness instead of trying to feel happy by trying to make someone else happy. All my actions seem to be try to please others and then feel happy if they are happy. And end up pushing my own requirements and happiness to the back.
Have to get back to focusing on my own self, appreciate all the good people with their positive energy and feel better about my own self worth and do good.
7:10 got on the issue of logging on to the test machines with Sweta. was over by 9am.
Got to pay rent, bills, ,,, send mail to vaughn systems.
Got msg from Aji regaring negotiating with Sangi for my leave. Looks like Sep10th is a no go as there is SIT (system integration test) starting for 2 weeks from Sep13. :(
Best possible dates seem to be latter on. need to now check to see flights and climate. don't want to go in any snowy conditions.
Got to decide, is it going to be just spain or just Czech? given evas attitude of treating me like an enemy, don't feel comfortable going there and then having to face the hostile behavior. Rather go alone and enjoy by my own.
around 11:40 got msg from Ajay about going out for dosa at dosa hut :) wanted to go home and get the docs and pay the rent. decicded to go for dosa and latter came back and around 2:10 went home. got the docs.
Send mail to Vaughn about new dates request and sorry for the earlier one on Sep 12.
Back to office and meeting around 3pm-4.
off work after sending in the Expense report and sheets to Prida .. then send fax for the receiptes to be uploaded via the system
Wanted to go out running, but was so lost, fell on to the couch after eating and woke up around 12.
Getting lazy and stressed out about this Euro trip. Had sent out email to Vaughn regarding new possible dates. Have to wait for approval again before making the next move.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Monday, August 30, 2010
Aug 30 Monday,,,, effects of Cheese
Monday, Aug 30 - 2010
---------------------
Had troubled sleep at night with the effects of Cheese-Nachos from yesterday. Guess I am not built for eating cheese. :()
Today with sangi and kris coming back from vacation, I get to know where I stand as regards to the Euro vacation.
got into work around 7:05..... sweta was ready there pinging me, she seemed to be in a happy mood.
8:45 finised showing her the mystries of conf transfer, blind transfer.
Sent out Cogs time sheets. prepared ones for the 15th of next month.
Feeling really bad in the stomach,, so went and got myself Tea and put in lot of lemon in it. Hoping that will break up all the greasy cheese.
Just remember call from balaji and not been able to return his call, should call him today. Was too lost in the beauty of Princeton Univ. to make the call.
Sent msg to Aji reminding him about leave.
Got call from Nar saying about his baby and her acclimatizing to Indian conditions.
Then an heartly talk with anil and during the talk I just completed a in-house course of cogs. got 2 hrs of learning credit in 30 mins hehehe;)
3 to 4 meeting sangi was there. after the meeting went and met Aji again regarding the holidays. But was not able to get any definitive dates. And Sangi saying that System Integration Testing was starting on 13th for 2 weeks. got to see if I can get atleast after that.
Called up malini for salsa and had a blast dancing ... got asked more than asking to dance. especially dancing with Marsha. She is so easy to lead. She kept saying that I should not sit, I should be dancing... hehehe.. I like her encouragement.
---------------------
Had troubled sleep at night with the effects of Cheese-Nachos from yesterday. Guess I am not built for eating cheese. :()
Today with sangi and kris coming back from vacation, I get to know where I stand as regards to the Euro vacation.
got into work around 7:05..... sweta was ready there pinging me, she seemed to be in a happy mood.
8:45 finised showing her the mystries of conf transfer, blind transfer.
Sent out Cogs time sheets. prepared ones for the 15th of next month.
Feeling really bad in the stomach,, so went and got myself Tea and put in lot of lemon in it. Hoping that will break up all the greasy cheese.
Just remember call from balaji and not been able to return his call, should call him today. Was too lost in the beauty of Princeton Univ. to make the call.
Sent msg to Aji reminding him about leave.
Got call from Nar saying about his baby and her acclimatizing to Indian conditions.
Then an heartly talk with anil and during the talk I just completed a in-house course of cogs. got 2 hrs of learning credit in 30 mins hehehe;)
3 to 4 meeting sangi was there. after the meeting went and met Aji again regarding the holidays. But was not able to get any definitive dates. And Sangi saying that System Integration Testing was starting on 13th for 2 weeks. got to see if I can get atleast after that.
Called up malini for salsa and had a blast dancing ... got asked more than asking to dance. especially dancing with Marsha. She is so easy to lead. She kept saying that I should not sit, I should be dancing... hehehe.. I like her encouragement.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Aug 29 2010 , Mountain Lake & Art At Princeton
Sunday, 29th Aug 2010
---------------------
Wake up around 7:30am thinking I am going to be late for the hike in Princeton. Hike is at 10:45am, about an hrs drive, so was okay.
Just have to start off by 9am.
Should be interesting hike as malini told me that she was going to introduce me to Hyderabadi biriyani after the hike.
Would like to go the Alchemist & Barrister with the group for beer and eats after. As it was a nice place and very accommodating, waitress last time we were there.
lets see how it feels as the day progress. Biriyani or European food.
Wow what a day it was... the Great week-ennd
Got to the hiking and was greated by people, obviously they all missed me. :) from last weekend.
awww it was touching.
Reached Princeton University, New Jersey around 10:30 just about the end of gas in my car. It was a very pleasant hike, got talking with Kelly and Mariola from poland.
Then around 2pm we went to the Art Muesuem of Princeton University, had lots of painting and other historical facts and statues from Roman period.
After that we all went to Alchemist and Barristas for Lunch.. was sitting at a table with 4 ladies and they so very educated me on the operas, broadway shows, classics and woooo it was so very intellectually stimulating. Was given advice on what to look out for in Europe,,,so much contradicting Evas stories about Europe or the glossy part she just selectively choose to reveal and criticize all India as been filled with Cheats... damm @#$%^
Then there were a few touching moments with Malini, Sidney sure was happy to see her. She is really a very Classy gal. So full of confidence and very intelligent and worldly knowledgeable.
Got back home around 7pm with my iPhones battery going dead and lossing my way once on the highway. ended up taking 1 north instead of 1 south.
---------------------
Wake up around 7:30am thinking I am going to be late for the hike in Princeton. Hike is at 10:45am, about an hrs drive, so was okay.
Just have to start off by 9am.
Should be interesting hike as malini told me that she was going to introduce me to Hyderabadi biriyani after the hike.
Would like to go the Alchemist & Barrister with the group for beer and eats after. As it was a nice place and very accommodating, waitress last time we were there.
lets see how it feels as the day progress. Biriyani or European food.
Wow what a day it was... the Great week-ennd
Got to the hiking and was greated by people, obviously they all missed me. :) from last weekend.
awww it was touching.
Reached Princeton University, New Jersey around 10:30 just about the end of gas in my car. It was a very pleasant hike, got talking with Kelly and Mariola from poland.
Then around 2pm we went to the Art Muesuem of Princeton University, had lots of painting and other historical facts and statues from Roman period.
After that we all went to Alchemist and Barristas for Lunch.. was sitting at a table with 4 ladies and they so very educated me on the operas, broadway shows, classics and woooo it was so very intellectually stimulating. Was given advice on what to look out for in Europe,,,so much contradicting Evas stories about Europe or the glossy part she just selectively choose to reveal and criticize all India as been filled with Cheats... damm @#$%^
Then there were a few touching moments with Malini, Sidney sure was happy to see her. She is really a very Classy gal. So full of confidence and very intelligent and worldly knowledgeable.
Got back home around 7pm with my iPhones battery going dead and lossing my way once on the highway. ended up taking 1 north instead of 1 south.
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Aug 28 2010 , malini, Kayaking, hiking, accident
Saturday, Aug 28 2010
---------------------
wake up still sleepy and tired from a week of traveling and trying to adjust back form the Texas heat to warmth of philly, got to clean up the house of sensitive documents.
The weather looks great outside.
Was also debating on meeting Eva in czech, with the hostile angry way she is behaving.
Why would I want any help or anything with her with that attitude towards me. Whats the point in meeting her parents when she is going to behave like a sick in the head angry person towards me. Not a good situation to go into. Rather I go to Spain and then go with the flow and if she likes she can join me and I would like that too to be in neutral territory we meet and get over this negativity.
It looks like she has not changed at all. She is still the same, self centered, superficial, insensitive,I am a diva, i am too good to be your friend person.
Just have to give it to the friends who said that I am living a foolishness, I am fooling myself into believing that with the Indian experience her attitude would change and she would become more of a team player, as her blog seems to suggest. But the basic instincts just remain. Or is she just fooling herself to avoid facing the guilt of her own actions.
Well i guess she has to grow more to realize that its better to accept with honesty the wrongs she did than try to blame someone else.
Anyways its her life, I have to try and get my head off been concerned about her and stop hurting myself.
ookaaayyy day of kayaking the peace valley, hiking, Vino tasting in the Vino yard (wine yard) .... cheers and maybe some salsa at the end of the day.
Called up home, talked with mom and dad, was having a hard time convincing dad, who wanted me to just come soon and get married. was trying to tell him that I could not come as I do not have enough leave.
Then latter malini comes, her dad calls her up and I could understand the turmoil she is going thru with the questions from her dad.
After she tasted my ginger tea, we started off.
When we were getting out of the appartment complex.... An old man backed into me. Nothing seems to have been damaged visually.
Thou he admitted his mistake, he seemed to be reluctant to give me his drivers license or registration..... only after I got a bit serious, did he show me his license. William,,, thou he told me his name is bill.
Malini latter told me that william is commonly knows as bill.... it was a bit traumatizing. But as the day went by the shock of the image of some ones car backing up into mine was going down.
Then we went to paneera for mailini to grab something to eat. And To PEACE Valley it was.... again a gorgeous view.
Had to wait for few mins before we got the double kayak. hehehehehe and both of don't know to swim. just the trust in the old worn out life jacket.
One of my best days yet.. peace valley and kayaking about 3 hrs around the peaceful lake and for the first time in my life saw deers, swans, heron and many other birds, I always only saw in pics. It was like a movie in 3D and live with the pleasant breeze blowing and cloudless sky shining in its glorious brightness.
We even sat in the middle of all the peace and calmness and mediated for some time. it was such an awesome feeling.
Talking lots of stuff about life, each others history, psychology of men and women.
Ended the night with Vino and Italian pasta with chicken something.
---------------------
wake up still sleepy and tired from a week of traveling and trying to adjust back form the Texas heat to warmth of philly, got to clean up the house of sensitive documents.
The weather looks great outside.
Was also debating on meeting Eva in czech, with the hostile angry way she is behaving.
Why would I want any help or anything with her with that attitude towards me. Whats the point in meeting her parents when she is going to behave like a sick in the head angry person towards me. Not a good situation to go into. Rather I go to Spain and then go with the flow and if she likes she can join me and I would like that too to be in neutral territory we meet and get over this negativity.
It looks like she has not changed at all. She is still the same, self centered, superficial, insensitive,I am a diva, i am too good to be your friend person.
Just have to give it to the friends who said that I am living a foolishness, I am fooling myself into believing that with the Indian experience her attitude would change and she would become more of a team player, as her blog seems to suggest. But the basic instincts just remain. Or is she just fooling herself to avoid facing the guilt of her own actions.
Well i guess she has to grow more to realize that its better to accept with honesty the wrongs she did than try to blame someone else.
Anyways its her life, I have to try and get my head off been concerned about her and stop hurting myself.
ookaaayyy day of kayaking the peace valley, hiking, Vino tasting in the Vino yard (wine yard) .... cheers and maybe some salsa at the end of the day.
Called up home, talked with mom and dad, was having a hard time convincing dad, who wanted me to just come soon and get married. was trying to tell him that I could not come as I do not have enough leave.
Then latter malini comes, her dad calls her up and I could understand the turmoil she is going thru with the questions from her dad.
After she tasted my ginger tea, we started off.
When we were getting out of the appartment complex.... An old man backed into me. Nothing seems to have been damaged visually.
Thou he admitted his mistake, he seemed to be reluctant to give me his drivers license or registration..... only after I got a bit serious, did he show me his license. William,,, thou he told me his name is bill.
Malini latter told me that william is commonly knows as bill.... it was a bit traumatizing. But as the day went by the shock of the image of some ones car backing up into mine was going down.
Then we went to paneera for mailini to grab something to eat. And To PEACE Valley it was.... again a gorgeous view.
Had to wait for few mins before we got the double kayak. hehehehehe and both of don't know to swim. just the trust in the old worn out life jacket.
One of my best days yet.. peace valley and kayaking about 3 hrs around the peaceful lake and for the first time in my life saw deers, swans, heron and many other birds, I always only saw in pics. It was like a movie in 3D and live with the pleasant breeze blowing and cloudless sky shining in its glorious brightness.
We even sat in the middle of all the peace and calmness and mediated for some time. it was such an awesome feeling.
Talking lots of stuff about life, each others history, psychology of men and women.
Ended the night with Vino and Italian pasta with chicken something.
Friday, August 27, 2010
Aug 27 Friday,
Friday, Aug 27 2010
-------------------
Dalai Lama:
Despair is never a solution, it is the ultimate failure. In Tibetan we say, “if the rope breaks nine times, we must splice it together a tenth time”.
Even if ultimately we do fail, at least we will have no feelings of regret. And when we combine this insight with a clear appreciation of our potential to benefit others, we can begin to restore our hope and confidence.
Got to thank people for making me feel proud of myself and helping me realize how deeply I can LOVE..... wow guess not even in story books have I come across my dedication and sincerity...... I am really feeling happy at realizing the depth of my ability in a relationship.
And also realize that maybe nature is making sure that the people who do not deserve it DON't get it and pushing them away from me :).,.... Thank you god and nature and the whole Universe for what ever you are doing.
Thinking of the song I heard a few days ago, "I thank god for all the unanswered prayers" :)
Wake up by 4:30 with the hope of getting to work by 6:30 and starting off with the Knowledge transfer to sweta. But was not able to get out of bed. Was thinking thru the conversation with Malini yesterday night.
About cheating and how she thinks its a man thing been a victim and also one who ended up doing it and learning from her own past mistake.
Atleast she made an attempt to own up to her mistakes. thats a good thing.
Not many people are able to be honest with them selves about it. And would rather try and lie more about it to themselves and then make the victim in it look like they were the ones who are the Villians.
hahaha. How foolish can some people get. Its like some people who claim and show how spiritual they are, quote great words from scriptures , Buddha, dalai lama, Gita, Bible, Zen, ,,, and when it comes to practicing any of it, HUGE GAP. Suddenly showing how superficial they are.
Same way when they face with the reality of bad their actions, instead of been honest with themself, they rather get angry and try to blame others. Easiest and more a basic instinct of reaction.
I really would love to see how some peoples life turn out. Thou so far from my brief observation I have only seen them keep repeating the same pattern of behavior from one relationship to another.
And as Ajay so righty said, he found his lady friends who confide in him about their relationship, just saying or claiming that now they have matured and then again end up doing the same mistakes. Its like they are still the same person, but no real change in attitude.
Same thing I noticed with Del. She was showing the same traits when she wanted to move from her guy to another, she showed the same traits, even the words matched with what Eva did.
Ohhhh god, its like all these women seem to have it hard wired in them, or how else could it be so much of similarity in the actions and words.
\
Talking about superficiality,,,,,
No heart. just the outter body.
Just like many people who dance, some just perform and they perform for the attention from others. And then there are ones who just dance for the love of it and enjoying the moment.
Seems to be common trend, once people get on to stage and perform, they get addicted to the brief attention. And they can never let it go. So many I keep seeing time after time, city after city, people starting off learning and enjoying and then as soon as they start getting into the performace mode, the high , the rush and the feeling of power gets to their head and they are lost. No more heart in their social dancing.
Biggest issue afflicting the politicians in power and also the Stars of the Movies.
On monday even I had the same experience of people clapping and cheering on the merengue, that girl Jordana I danced with (seems very nice and down to earth), has now become so high and hooked after the attention she got after the dance. Me too, had to cool my own ego off by sitting out at the back for an hour. And this was a social dance, so I can imagine the rush of high after a great performance on stage. That rush and the addiction to the attention is much higher. And me again been a shy guy , after the attention winning social dance, just went to the back of the crowd and stayed there for about 1 hr. not venturing on to the dance floor.
Just got a call from narayan concerned about his wife and baby landing unexpectedly in mumbai instead of hyderbad. Poor guy is not able to sleep since yesterday. Guess its an indian thing of been concerned about people we love.
saw eva on the google chat, wanted to ask her about the immigration in mumbai airport,,,, again she seems to be showing hostile attitude, wondering if I even want to take any help from someone with that attitude.
12 to 2 farewel party at the Thai restaurant for ashi
yummy coconut milk chicken curry.. just like in kerala.
3 to 4 QC meeting
Evening get out, called up malini and left a msg, got call back latter saying that she is too tired to make it to salsa and wanted to go kayaking at peace valley and will be coming to my house and so we can both go.
Called up tara and left a msg if she would be interested in going to salsa.
Talked with anil and then narayan for sometime. narayans family reached Hyd safely. :)
off to salsa now and peacevalley hiking and kayaing tomorrow. :)
Then hiking again at Princeton near malanis house.. gosh week ends are becoming malini dates.
Salsa was okay, got to meet a sweet gal Maureen and her friend, who were constantly looking and me and smiling. A smile that one gives a person when they have know them for quite a long time, a smile of understanding acknowledgement. Not able to place them. Where did I see them before?
But really warmed my heart to the many smiles I got from them and the constant eye contact across the room. Maureen was really good looking and had she smelled good, what ever perfume she used, it was really good.
-------------------
Dalai Lama:
Despair is never a solution, it is the ultimate failure. In Tibetan we say, “if the rope breaks nine times, we must splice it together a tenth time”.
Even if ultimately we do fail, at least we will have no feelings of regret. And when we combine this insight with a clear appreciation of our potential to benefit others, we can begin to restore our hope and confidence.
Got to thank people for making me feel proud of myself and helping me realize how deeply I can LOVE..... wow guess not even in story books have I come across my dedication and sincerity...... I am really feeling happy at realizing the depth of my ability in a relationship.
And also realize that maybe nature is making sure that the people who do not deserve it DON't get it and pushing them away from me :).,.... Thank you god and nature and the whole Universe for what ever you are doing.
Thinking of the song I heard a few days ago, "I thank god for all the unanswered prayers" :)
Wake up by 4:30 with the hope of getting to work by 6:30 and starting off with the Knowledge transfer to sweta. But was not able to get out of bed. Was thinking thru the conversation with Malini yesterday night.
About cheating and how she thinks its a man thing been a victim and also one who ended up doing it and learning from her own past mistake.
Atleast she made an attempt to own up to her mistakes. thats a good thing.
Not many people are able to be honest with them selves about it. And would rather try and lie more about it to themselves and then make the victim in it look like they were the ones who are the Villians.
hahaha. How foolish can some people get. Its like some people who claim and show how spiritual they are, quote great words from scriptures , Buddha, dalai lama, Gita, Bible, Zen, ,,, and when it comes to practicing any of it, HUGE GAP. Suddenly showing how superficial they are.
Same way when they face with the reality of bad their actions, instead of been honest with themself, they rather get angry and try to blame others. Easiest and more a basic instinct of reaction.
I really would love to see how some peoples life turn out. Thou so far from my brief observation I have only seen them keep repeating the same pattern of behavior from one relationship to another.
And as Ajay so righty said, he found his lady friends who confide in him about their relationship, just saying or claiming that now they have matured and then again end up doing the same mistakes. Its like they are still the same person, but no real change in attitude.
Same thing I noticed with Del. She was showing the same traits when she wanted to move from her guy to another, she showed the same traits, even the words matched with what Eva did.
Ohhhh god, its like all these women seem to have it hard wired in them, or how else could it be so much of similarity in the actions and words.
\
Talking about superficiality,,,,,
No heart. just the outter body.
Just like many people who dance, some just perform and they perform for the attention from others. And then there are ones who just dance for the love of it and enjoying the moment.
Seems to be common trend, once people get on to stage and perform, they get addicted to the brief attention. And they can never let it go. So many I keep seeing time after time, city after city, people starting off learning and enjoying and then as soon as they start getting into the performace mode, the high , the rush and the feeling of power gets to their head and they are lost. No more heart in their social dancing.
Biggest issue afflicting the politicians in power and also the Stars of the Movies.
On monday even I had the same experience of people clapping and cheering on the merengue, that girl Jordana I danced with (seems very nice and down to earth), has now become so high and hooked after the attention she got after the dance. Me too, had to cool my own ego off by sitting out at the back for an hour. And this was a social dance, so I can imagine the rush of high after a great performance on stage. That rush and the addiction to the attention is much higher. And me again been a shy guy , after the attention winning social dance, just went to the back of the crowd and stayed there for about 1 hr. not venturing on to the dance floor.
Just got a call from narayan concerned about his wife and baby landing unexpectedly in mumbai instead of hyderbad. Poor guy is not able to sleep since yesterday. Guess its an indian thing of been concerned about people we love.
saw eva on the google chat, wanted to ask her about the immigration in mumbai airport,,,, again she seems to be showing hostile attitude, wondering if I even want to take any help from someone with that attitude.
12 to 2 farewel party at the Thai restaurant for ashi
yummy coconut milk chicken curry.. just like in kerala.
3 to 4 QC meeting
Evening get out, called up malini and left a msg, got call back latter saying that she is too tired to make it to salsa and wanted to go kayaking at peace valley and will be coming to my house and so we can both go.
Called up tara and left a msg if she would be interested in going to salsa.
Talked with anil and then narayan for sometime. narayans family reached Hyd safely. :)
off to salsa now and peacevalley hiking and kayaing tomorrow. :)
Then hiking again at Princeton near malanis house.. gosh week ends are becoming malini dates.
Salsa was okay, got to meet a sweet gal Maureen and her friend, who were constantly looking and me and smiling. A smile that one gives a person when they have know them for quite a long time, a smile of understanding acknowledgement. Not able to place them. Where did I see them before?
But really warmed my heart to the many smiles I got from them and the constant eye contact across the room. Maureen was really good looking and had she smelled good, what ever perfume she used, it was really good.
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Aug 26, hangover after Vino tasting
Thrusday Aug 26- 2010
---------------------
Woke up with a hangover from drinking chilian vino... again forgot to have dinner, thou I cooked rice and had left over curry from the freezer that I had partially microwaved...... gosh the past few months have been living mostly on one time lunch.
Reached work around 7:05 am got stuck by the train gates...:) but hey beautiful day, thanks to the universe for another great start of day. :)
upto 9am assisting sweta with making the call so that we have a smooth transition for her to do the testings.
Tried calling up Evas number , not sure if its hers or someone else as it just kept ringing. So got the idea to send her the sms from the vodafone site.
Got chatting with nilesh, he is now into solar farming consultance. www.movya.com
Thats a good one. remains to be seen how much margin he can make or has in this business.
Gave ajay money for yesterdays lunch at Dosa hut. $14, dosa, vada, idli and gobi manchurian.
Also got mail from raj about the places to visit in Spain. Said he is busy with all projects in Europe starting in Sep after Aug holidays.
Went home and tried calling up the DOL, but again only getting to the voice mail.
3 to 4 QC meeting. ended up chating with Eva ,, again for some reason she seems to be pissed off at me..... gosh these women really know how to lie to themselves and fool themselves into believing things in a crazy way.
Wonder what she convinced herself now.
The cold way she told me about it, kind of made me wonder if there is any reason to take her help at all. Why would I want to vist someones house and parents if that person is treating me like an enemy.
It would be strange and odd with her behaving like she wants to kill me and trying to even talk with her parents who would not be able to speak in any language I know.
What is really with all these women and their craziness?
Now I am getting to understand why as per most tradition they are considered better off at home taking care of the home, kids and then their husbands. Because for a man to put up with their craziness he deserves to be pampered.
And this further explains why the ones who are not pampered often drift away if they have the opportunities. :)
Laws of nature, man should just shut his mouth and go about doing what he should, if the women does not appreciate him move to the one who appreciates the fact that he is putting up with her pshycotic craziness and unexplained moodiness.
Talked with Aji regarding the leave and the Green card. seems he got msg from HR saying that I need to complete one year before been able to apply for a Green card.
Got call from malini guess she wants to plan tomorrows salsa outting
had a good talk with Anil ,, hehe we end up talking like teenagers.. damm hope that we don't end up talking like that in front of our kids.
Around 10:30pm got a call from malini, it was a very revealing conversation of each other and our past relationships. Nice bonding. Got to see how this will go.
She seems to have all the fine qualities of a princess. But a princess is not who I am looking for and neither am I a polished prince. ,,,,,
She is surely someone who many guys will be very very happy to be with.
I on the other hand am a guy who because of circumstance had ended up doing minimum wages jobs. Don't believe in spending on luxury items, just buy the on sale dress for $5 and $10 at walmart kind of guy. Happy sleeping even in a sleeping bag. A simple guy with simple tastes, which was one of the reasons I got so attracted towards Eva and her unsually down to earth life style. But had it not been for her Anger and Self Centered Ego of I know everything and you and your thoughts and ideas are not worth anything. She would have been the ideal girl for me if only she could change a bit of her attitude and learn to be a bit more humble.
Thou she claims on her blog that India changed her a lot, it only seems to have just impacted her in little dots, not really a whole lot. And if only she is able to connect the dots and make a continous line or brush stroke,,,,, I would just be even able to give my life for her without any hesitation.
---------------------
Woke up with a hangover from drinking chilian vino... again forgot to have dinner, thou I cooked rice and had left over curry from the freezer that I had partially microwaved...... gosh the past few months have been living mostly on one time lunch.
Reached work around 7:05 am got stuck by the train gates...:) but hey beautiful day, thanks to the universe for another great start of day. :)
upto 9am assisting sweta with making the call so that we have a smooth transition for her to do the testings.
Tried calling up Evas number , not sure if its hers or someone else as it just kept ringing. So got the idea to send her the sms from the vodafone site.
Got chatting with nilesh, he is now into solar farming consultance. www.movya.com
Thats a good one. remains to be seen how much margin he can make or has in this business.
Gave ajay money for yesterdays lunch at Dosa hut. $14, dosa, vada, idli and gobi manchurian.
Also got mail from raj about the places to visit in Spain. Said he is busy with all projects in Europe starting in Sep after Aug holidays.
Went home and tried calling up the DOL, but again only getting to the voice mail.
3 to 4 QC meeting. ended up chating with Eva ,, again for some reason she seems to be pissed off at me..... gosh these women really know how to lie to themselves and fool themselves into believing things in a crazy way.
Wonder what she convinced herself now.
The cold way she told me about it, kind of made me wonder if there is any reason to take her help at all. Why would I want to vist someones house and parents if that person is treating me like an enemy.
It would be strange and odd with her behaving like she wants to kill me and trying to even talk with her parents who would not be able to speak in any language I know.
What is really with all these women and their craziness?
Now I am getting to understand why as per most tradition they are considered better off at home taking care of the home, kids and then their husbands. Because for a man to put up with their craziness he deserves to be pampered.
And this further explains why the ones who are not pampered often drift away if they have the opportunities. :)
Laws of nature, man should just shut his mouth and go about doing what he should, if the women does not appreciate him move to the one who appreciates the fact that he is putting up with her pshycotic craziness and unexplained moodiness.
Talked with Aji regarding the leave and the Green card. seems he got msg from HR saying that I need to complete one year before been able to apply for a Green card.
Got call from malini guess she wants to plan tomorrows salsa outting
had a good talk with Anil ,, hehe we end up talking like teenagers.. damm hope that we don't end up talking like that in front of our kids.
Around 10:30pm got a call from malini, it was a very revealing conversation of each other and our past relationships. Nice bonding. Got to see how this will go.
She seems to have all the fine qualities of a princess. But a princess is not who I am looking for and neither am I a polished prince. ,,,,,
She is surely someone who many guys will be very very happy to be with.
I on the other hand am a guy who because of circumstance had ended up doing minimum wages jobs. Don't believe in spending on luxury items, just buy the on sale dress for $5 and $10 at walmart kind of guy. Happy sleeping even in a sleeping bag. A simple guy with simple tastes, which was one of the reasons I got so attracted towards Eva and her unsually down to earth life style. But had it not been for her Anger and Self Centered Ego of I know everything and you and your thoughts and ideas are not worth anything. She would have been the ideal girl for me if only she could change a bit of her attitude and learn to be a bit more humble.
Thou she claims on her blog that India changed her a lot, it only seems to have just impacted her in little dots, not really a whole lot. And if only she is able to connect the dots and make a continous line or brush stroke,,,,, I would just be even able to give my life for her without any hesitation.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Aug 25, wakeing with a sense of goodness
Wednesday Aug 25 2010
---------------------
Woke up with beautiful dreams, hmmmmm what a feeling and started thinking philosophical stuff that was motivating from my own lifes stories.
Had time to eat cereals and a cup of coffee before heading out to work. Its been a long time since I did this. now to sneak in and get back to the routine of doing some work out too. :)
So should I go salsa or just for a run tonite.
Still high on monday nights Onam special high energy-merengue and flirty Cha-cha.
Loged on to skype, saw madrita martho on skype, just shouted a Ahoj to her and then ran out of the door to my lovely trusty car.
reached work around 7:10am sweta was on the chat got to help set her up with the Avaya connection...
So salsa its tonite for now... lets see if I can get the others to come.
The words that got me today :
When one door slams shut on your face,
life opens other doors,
like the fresh sunshine of early morning.
full of hope and wonder :)
Most of the time in all our innocence and innocent instinct,
We end up looking at the shut door with a truck load off all kinds of unanswered questions.
As hard as it is to pull away, we may have to pull away,
as there is plenty in this world to go by,
just have to believe in the PLENTIFUL ness of OUR WORLD :) cheers ;)
But the moment we turn and look around,
We will start seeing the Doors opening with the lights of fresh sunshine, inviting us into a new day.
We have to enter it with an open heart and mind.
Try and let go of the EVIL Dark shut door with the bag of unanswered questions.
They did not know your true potential. :)
They lost you as they are lost in their sense of foolish arrogance and powerful pride.
10 to 11 status meeting
msg to aji about leave to go on leave, said will let me know as soon as he talks with Sangita. And she is on leave till monday.....
Chatted with John and Nilesh on google chat, john is in the process of short selling his house..... too bad with the way both our lives seem to go up and down. But john was brave enough to get married.
12: went out with Ajay for dosa, vada and idli at dosa house.
Discussing the western girls and girls from India and their mentalities......... universal agreement that Women are very selfish creatures and will always be taking and painting the men in their life as something bad, maybe with the exception of their father and brothers.
Other than that every man made a HUGE mistake hence they moved to the next guy. But ajays experience with the girls he is friends with is that they keep repeating the same mistakes with the next guy. Even thou they claim that they have changed since the past relationship and have grown.
hmmmmm interesting. Is that a hint from the universe to me?
Got busy with doing the research on the Euro trip.
A bit pissed off with Ajis way of handling things about the leave.
Latter talking with narayan got to know his wife and baby are going off to india the next few days. And then to the question I asked him yesterday about my tirp to Europe. He said the very same thing I was thinking but was in doubt.
Talked with Chakri and told him about the Euro trip too.
Was not in a great mood to go out salsa dancing and got a mail from malani about wanting to coordinate going to salsa better. She does not seem to be much different from Eva, just that she is Indian from the the south and much more intelligent and able to hold a conversation on her own.
Also sent out mail to Soile, she is stil the best. The best dance partner to dance with. No wonder so many guys in Vancouver just love dancing with her.
Tells a lot about her attitude. Dancing shows.
I guess it showed to me on monday how much I am worthy, when I got the a compliment "Amazing" from Jordana and couple of other girls.
Jordan kind of made it special for me with the way she came to say bye before she left. Hope to see her around again soon. She is my first fan in Philly. :)
---------------------
Woke up with beautiful dreams, hmmmmm what a feeling and started thinking philosophical stuff that was motivating from my own lifes stories.
Had time to eat cereals and a cup of coffee before heading out to work. Its been a long time since I did this. now to sneak in and get back to the routine of doing some work out too. :)
So should I go salsa or just for a run tonite.
Still high on monday nights Onam special high energy-merengue and flirty Cha-cha.
Loged on to skype, saw madrita martho on skype, just shouted a Ahoj to her and then ran out of the door to my lovely trusty car.
reached work around 7:10am sweta was on the chat got to help set her up with the Avaya connection...
So salsa its tonite for now... lets see if I can get the others to come.
The words that got me today :
When one door slams shut on your face,
life opens other doors,
like the fresh sunshine of early morning.
full of hope and wonder :)
Most of the time in all our innocence and innocent instinct,
We end up looking at the shut door with a truck load off all kinds of unanswered questions.
As hard as it is to pull away, we may have to pull away,
as there is plenty in this world to go by,
just have to believe in the PLENTIFUL ness of OUR WORLD :) cheers ;)
But the moment we turn and look around,
We will start seeing the Doors opening with the lights of fresh sunshine, inviting us into a new day.
We have to enter it with an open heart and mind.
Try and let go of the EVIL Dark shut door with the bag of unanswered questions.
They did not know your true potential. :)
They lost you as they are lost in their sense of foolish arrogance and powerful pride.
10 to 11 status meeting
msg to aji about leave to go on leave, said will let me know as soon as he talks with Sangita. And she is on leave till monday.....
Chatted with John and Nilesh on google chat, john is in the process of short selling his house..... too bad with the way both our lives seem to go up and down. But john was brave enough to get married.
12: went out with Ajay for dosa, vada and idli at dosa house.
Discussing the western girls and girls from India and their mentalities......... universal agreement that Women are very selfish creatures and will always be taking and painting the men in their life as something bad, maybe with the exception of their father and brothers.
Other than that every man made a HUGE mistake hence they moved to the next guy. But ajays experience with the girls he is friends with is that they keep repeating the same mistakes with the next guy. Even thou they claim that they have changed since the past relationship and have grown.
hmmmmm interesting. Is that a hint from the universe to me?
Got busy with doing the research on the Euro trip.
A bit pissed off with Ajis way of handling things about the leave.
Latter talking with narayan got to know his wife and baby are going off to india the next few days. And then to the question I asked him yesterday about my tirp to Europe. He said the very same thing I was thinking but was in doubt.
Talked with Chakri and told him about the Euro trip too.
Was not in a great mood to go out salsa dancing and got a mail from malani about wanting to coordinate going to salsa better. She does not seem to be much different from Eva, just that she is Indian from the the south and much more intelligent and able to hold a conversation on her own.
Also sent out mail to Soile, she is stil the best. The best dance partner to dance with. No wonder so many guys in Vancouver just love dancing with her.
Tells a lot about her attitude. Dancing shows.
I guess it showed to me on monday how much I am worthy, when I got the a compliment "Amazing" from Jordana and couple of other girls.
Jordan kind of made it special for me with the way she came to say bye before she left. Hope to see her around again soon. She is my first fan in Philly. :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)