Sun, May 9, 2010
******************************************
Had a night marish sleep at Narayans place. Was thinking about missing documents and that I had left stuff off in Vancouver. Woke up a few times thinking that I did not pack and move stuff from vancouver.
Narayans wife makes Brunch, few Chappathis, spicy mutton curry,, yummy.!!! And then they head out to Ottawa , Canada and me and Viki head to Lansdale.
We get to take some home ,, ahhh I am all set for the next week, with yummy Andhra mutton keema curry and another veggie fry, that I liked, must be cabbage and carrot, finely sliced and diced and fried. hmmmm :)
Start off from Narayans house around 11:20am. No stop at the temple. reached Lansdale around 1pm. Head to Sultan restaurant for the Punjabi Buffet lunch. woooo I could not walk after eating and stuffing my self with the food and the sweets..... Ate more of the sweets than the food. :)))
3:40pm sent out mail to Radish for the salary of two weeks work at Guardian/Satyam/Apex2000. With Muhus address to send the check. lets see what happens.
chatted with Evas dad Lubo. He just got back from a competition with his students and was exhausted living in a room of over 20 noisey kids who were just chatting thru out the night. Poor man.
7pm went out for a walk, kind of chill with the wind gust blowing. Went to the park/hike trail. Sat there and was kind of wondering how different this is from the city life. Hardly anyone around. Lots of birds freely flying around and atleast 2 more hours for sun set.
Called up Balaji in California, cause I was reminded of him when I saw a family of Indians walking by. He just got back from Kerala. And when he returned he found that all the electronic items in his house hold in US were stolen. TV, lap top, camera, Desk top..... What a shocking experience to come back to the land of plenty and to find thing stolen.
The thief entered by opening a window and had locked the door (latched) from inside. And he had to call the leasing off and then the cops to get into his own house. Lucky he landed in the afternoon and not during the night.
His wife seems to be more affected by it.
Latter returned home listening to Merengue songs. Got a couple of text messages from Sara. sweet of her! Atleast there is one girl who really seems to like me and dance with me. And she feels really sincere and honest ("I hope").
Got call from Anil who was returning from JC penny. His parents are coming tomorrow. And discussed about the car insurance with him. And then saw that there was provision for entering Canadian Drivers license and registration. So after getting the dates from Linda of the approximate arrival of the date of my car. I can get the insurance online.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Docs appointment and then to NJ
Sat, May 8, 2010
******************************************
wake up with intermittent sleep. Then get out of sleeping bag around 7am.
And today the guys at work are having the Ghost hunt. Well i have docs appointment @ 9:30. So it kind of feels bad but have to do whats priority. Something I think I should learn a lot from Eva. She is so focused, wish that she had a little more focus on me, when we were together and things would have happened different. But hey she is who she is. Only she can change her own attitude. No one else can, and even if they make it will temp and will have very different side effects.
Just like me telling her that I cannot live with someone who kisses other guys on the lips. Its not cultural, nor anything external. ITs just that I cannot handle the jealous feeling and sick feeling of seeing something that I hold precious and very close to my heart. The purity of our relationship with its exclusive features always reserved for that one person only. And kissing on the lips happens to be very exclusive feature I think should only happen between who are in a relationship and are in exclusively in love.
Other wise its like any other one night stand or open relationship. There is nothing special in that.
Well back to the original story, so me telling her that I cannot live with someone who goes around kissing other guys on the lips and her getting very angry and abusing me and telling me mean things at that moment. And then latter trying to compromise with no real conviction. saying okay that is just a small thing. And the worst, "he (raymondo) will understand".. whats that supposed to mean? So out goes all the heated arguments she put across about the culture thing. hehehe, he was just there to seduce her and he was trying to work his way to just have sex with her by making the kiss the first step in breaking down her defence..... Well some gals will never learn.
Either Eva will become one of those gals who will either be going around the world having 1 month affairs or maybe have a sudden change of attitude and settle down with someone she really loves.
well so much for early morning sat thoughts. ahh there you go, the paradox of a women who seems to have extraordinary focus and then been a drifter and low in values, when it comes to ethics and relationship..... Well that thing about values may have saved me from making a huge mistake. But hey there were flags all along the way. But again those were things that could easily be worked out had she been open to communicating and discussing and not getting angry and throwing up a tantrum every time things did not go her way.
Crux of a relationship, is in both people been open to sit down and talk no matter how uncomfortable the situation feels. Thou she felt nice to hear me openly communicate, she had little inclination to openly and honestly communicate with me. Blamed it on her conservative upbringing, to relationship disaster with Mirav, Louis as her inability to openly express herself....
yea right, Blame every one but ones own attitude of thinking that lying and avoiding giving out information, is a great way to go about establishing TRUST in a relationship.
Hopefully people will realise that not openly revealing or only partially reveling is also equal to LYING and its not been fully honest. And soon the cracks caused by that will result in the collapse.
Went to the Hospital @ 9am with viki. There was an Indian doc there turned out to be from Tamil Nadu and another student doc again hot Indian gal following her around.
get the doc from there and then get home. pack up and head towards temple in New Jersey.
reache temple around 11:45am. The doors to the Gods sanctuary was closed and there was the weekly sat pooja going on. Opened up at 12:10. Then had some food at the canteen and headed towards Narayans house.
Again since his wife had cooked, we had to eat the lunch there.
Gave narayan the receipt for the Scotia bank that he needs to take to the US consulate in Ottawa. And towards night he realises that he needs another one for his wife too...
Hopefully he can get it done there on Monday morning.
Watched the movie "house full" again the main character Akshay Khanna reminded me of myself. Gals coming into my life to use me as a stepping stone..... wonder when my luck will ever change... Then see "page 3" about life in mumbai and show business and business world...
******************************************
wake up with intermittent sleep. Then get out of sleeping bag around 7am.
And today the guys at work are having the Ghost hunt. Well i have docs appointment @ 9:30. So it kind of feels bad but have to do whats priority. Something I think I should learn a lot from Eva. She is so focused, wish that she had a little more focus on me, when we were together and things would have happened different. But hey she is who she is. Only she can change her own attitude. No one else can, and even if they make it will temp and will have very different side effects.
Just like me telling her that I cannot live with someone who kisses other guys on the lips. Its not cultural, nor anything external. ITs just that I cannot handle the jealous feeling and sick feeling of seeing something that I hold precious and very close to my heart. The purity of our relationship with its exclusive features always reserved for that one person only. And kissing on the lips happens to be very exclusive feature I think should only happen between who are in a relationship and are in exclusively in love.
Other wise its like any other one night stand or open relationship. There is nothing special in that.
Well back to the original story, so me telling her that I cannot live with someone who goes around kissing other guys on the lips and her getting very angry and abusing me and telling me mean things at that moment. And then latter trying to compromise with no real conviction. saying okay that is just a small thing. And the worst, "he (raymondo) will understand".. whats that supposed to mean? So out goes all the heated arguments she put across about the culture thing. hehehe, he was just there to seduce her and he was trying to work his way to just have sex with her by making the kiss the first step in breaking down her defence..... Well some gals will never learn.
Either Eva will become one of those gals who will either be going around the world having 1 month affairs or maybe have a sudden change of attitude and settle down with someone she really loves.
well so much for early morning sat thoughts. ahh there you go, the paradox of a women who seems to have extraordinary focus and then been a drifter and low in values, when it comes to ethics and relationship..... Well that thing about values may have saved me from making a huge mistake. But hey there were flags all along the way. But again those were things that could easily be worked out had she been open to communicating and discussing and not getting angry and throwing up a tantrum every time things did not go her way.
Crux of a relationship, is in both people been open to sit down and talk no matter how uncomfortable the situation feels. Thou she felt nice to hear me openly communicate, she had little inclination to openly and honestly communicate with me. Blamed it on her conservative upbringing, to relationship disaster with Mirav, Louis as her inability to openly express herself....
yea right, Blame every one but ones own attitude of thinking that lying and avoiding giving out information, is a great way to go about establishing TRUST in a relationship.
Hopefully people will realise that not openly revealing or only partially reveling is also equal to LYING and its not been fully honest. And soon the cracks caused by that will result in the collapse.
Went to the Hospital @ 9am with viki. There was an Indian doc there turned out to be from Tamil Nadu and another student doc again hot Indian gal following her around.
get the doc from there and then get home. pack up and head towards temple in New Jersey.
reache temple around 11:45am. The doors to the Gods sanctuary was closed and there was the weekly sat pooja going on. Opened up at 12:10. Then had some food at the canteen and headed towards Narayans house.
Again since his wife had cooked, we had to eat the lunch there.
Gave narayan the receipt for the Scotia bank that he needs to take to the US consulate in Ottawa. And towards night he realises that he needs another one for his wife too...
Hopefully he can get it done there on Monday morning.
Watched the movie "house full" again the main character Akshay Khanna reminded me of myself. Gals coming into my life to use me as a stepping stone..... wonder when my luck will ever change... Then see "page 3" about life in mumbai and show business and business world...
Friday, May 7, 2010
Fresh start for a week end day
Fri, May 7, 2010
up at 5am. Fresh start for a week end day.
Guess E is already in New Delhi (or where ever she has gone to) by now, hope she is safe and not get caught in her naiveity with the bunch of crooks who are always out finding new ways to cheat and fool people.
After sometime trying to figure out the various screen pops.
Was also focusing on the Drivers licence and Insurance before my car gets here.
Got a quote from Geico.. about $300 / year. was told by kannan to check for AAA insuranc. lets see how that works out.
took out docs of the Drivers licence,,, should I give up the Canadian licence and go for a new one in PA? or should I go for a fresh one in PA?
Anyways went to the Hospital @ 3:40 got Doctors appointment by 4:00 and will be going to the Doc tomorrow morning around 9:30am.
Viki comes from Alentown. Pick me up from work and go home. Hesitates to try a shot of Sevovice... Then in the evening we drive off to Downtown, luckly this time we don't get lost much only lost in Downtown. Have a tough time trying to find a place to park, but get it eventually on spruce st. The streets are filled with party people, mostly students going drunk and crazy.
WE go to try out the Afgani restaurant there "Kabul" nice afgani ambience.... the food is exotic in its Afgani way. But not as spicey and aromatic as the South Indian dishes.... No wonder everyone wanted to reach the South of India. I had Lamb Chawal and Chai (masala chai) and viki had murug korma. (they sound so North Indian).
Then after that we try to go to Brazil for salsa, but Viki wearing flip-flops, we get turned down. So we decide to just walk around the down town for sometime and then head home.
Reach home and just crash...
up at 5am. Fresh start for a week end day.
Guess E is already in New Delhi (or where ever she has gone to) by now, hope she is safe and not get caught in her naiveity with the bunch of crooks who are always out finding new ways to cheat and fool people.
After sometime trying to figure out the various screen pops.
Was also focusing on the Drivers licence and Insurance before my car gets here.
Got a quote from Geico.. about $300 / year. was told by kannan to check for AAA insuranc. lets see how that works out.
took out docs of the Drivers licence,,, should I give up the Canadian licence and go for a new one in PA? or should I go for a fresh one in PA?
Anyways went to the Hospital @ 3:40 got Doctors appointment by 4:00 and will be going to the Doc tomorrow morning around 9:30am.
Viki comes from Alentown. Pick me up from work and go home. Hesitates to try a shot of Sevovice... Then in the evening we drive off to Downtown, luckly this time we don't get lost much only lost in Downtown. Have a tough time trying to find a place to park, but get it eventually on spruce st. The streets are filled with party people, mostly students going drunk and crazy.
WE go to try out the Afgani restaurant there "Kabul" nice afgani ambience.... the food is exotic in its Afgani way. But not as spicey and aromatic as the South Indian dishes.... No wonder everyone wanted to reach the South of India. I had Lamb Chawal and Chai (masala chai) and viki had murug korma. (they sound so North Indian).
Then after that we try to go to Brazil for salsa, but Viki wearing flip-flops, we get turned down. So we decide to just walk around the down town for sometime and then head home.
Reach home and just crash...
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Back in Philly and off to work
Thu, May 6, 2010
New day, with trying to catch up on sleep and adjusting sleep pattern.
Did not see Eva online for some time hope that things are well with her, thought that she was going on the 6th to Delhi. Well I just hope and pray that she is fine and nothing has happened to her.
Have to follow up on the discrepency on the pay check.. seems odd.
Call up att for the issues with the bill and discount.
12:00 depoist check to bank.
Get call from Ajit about group lunch,, miss out.
Talk with Narayan regarding the 131 I paid for him to get his vocher to the US consulate stamped and how to get the vochure to him before he goes to canada on sunday. Hope to meet him on friday night or sat . depending on coodination with Vikram.
Start focusing on getting the CTI issues solved.
Head home..... was feeling so tired for lack of sleep and not having had anything to eat yesterday. And now going off to sleep with out dinner. Well wish I was motivated enough to get up and cook.
New day, with trying to catch up on sleep and adjusting sleep pattern.
Did not see Eva online for some time hope that things are well with her, thought that she was going on the 6th to Delhi. Well I just hope and pray that she is fine and nothing has happened to her.
Have to follow up on the discrepency on the pay check.. seems odd.
Call up att for the issues with the bill and discount.
12:00 depoist check to bank.
Get call from Ajit about group lunch,, miss out.
Talk with Narayan regarding the 131 I paid for him to get his vocher to the US consulate stamped and how to get the vochure to him before he goes to canada on sunday. Hope to meet him on friday night or sat . depending on coodination with Vikram.
Start focusing on getting the CTI issues solved.
Head home..... was feeling so tired for lack of sleep and not having had anything to eat yesterday. And now going off to sleep with out dinner. Well wish I was motivated enough to get up and cook.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
DAY seven of packing and organizing and Moving
EArly morning flight to PHL via Seattle.
Went to sleep around 3:30am and woke up around 5am. Then started the rush to shower, throw out the remaining garbage that I missed out throwing.
Had separated the keys from the main bunch to drop off at the managers box.
Then called up Taxi, who turned up in 5mins instead of 10 mins.
Took out the garbage and then realised that I did not have the main enterance key...ahhh the taxi was outside... luckiely realized that I had opened up the outside door at the balcony and did not close it. So jumped across the railing and entered.. it was a narrow escape.
As there was no resident manager I could have called up and asked for the keys or to open the door and did not know anyone in the building either.
REached Airport around 6:30 and at the self checkin kisok I realised latter that I was inserting the passport the wrong side up.
Got thru the Customs with out any hassels as I already had a TN issued to me. he just asked what kind of TN visa, said Management Consultant and he just did a cross check and then stamped the passport with an entry date.
by 7:45 was inside. at gate 96E for flight to Seattle :)
Get into the Cute Orange colored plane on time. But there was a delay as they had to remove the baggage of someone who could not make it past the US immigration. Hence flight starts of at 9:30 instead of 8:50am... reach Seattle (Sea TAC) - SEA @ 9:30. wooo even there is free internet. niceee.
next flight @ 11:25 am (PST) from Terminal A2.\
@ 7:10 land in PHL (philadelphia). Was so wasted with no sleep. Forgot to take the carry on luggage I had. Only realized it when I got out. Ran to the US airways counter and they traced it out for me and got my carry on luggage with the 2nd official lap top and camera.
Then went to baggage claim to get the suitcase. With 3 bags in tow head to the Station for the train to Downtown Philly.
Get down at Market street and the take the 8:55pm connecting train to Penbrook on R5 route. Reach penbrook @9:45pm
Reach home 10pm EST. or 7pm PST.
Feeling hungry, They just don't give anything on the US flights and that kind of sucks for long distance flights.
Was thinking about what Sara said. How she felt a deep connection and that she felt as thou she knew me for a long time. Thou we only met 2 times. Its so strange how people connect. Is it because of the level of sincerity or is it just the nice feeling of security and trust that is invoked?
Went to sleep around 3:30am and woke up around 5am. Then started the rush to shower, throw out the remaining garbage that I missed out throwing.
Had separated the keys from the main bunch to drop off at the managers box.
Then called up Taxi, who turned up in 5mins instead of 10 mins.
Took out the garbage and then realised that I did not have the main enterance key...ahhh the taxi was outside... luckiely realized that I had opened up the outside door at the balcony and did not close it. So jumped across the railing and entered.. it was a narrow escape.
As there was no resident manager I could have called up and asked for the keys or to open the door and did not know anyone in the building either.
REached Airport around 6:30 and at the self checkin kisok I realised latter that I was inserting the passport the wrong side up.
Got thru the Customs with out any hassels as I already had a TN issued to me. he just asked what kind of TN visa, said Management Consultant and he just did a cross check and then stamped the passport with an entry date.
by 7:45 was inside. at gate 96E for flight to Seattle :)
Get into the Cute Orange colored plane on time. But there was a delay as they had to remove the baggage of someone who could not make it past the US immigration. Hence flight starts of at 9:30 instead of 8:50am... reach Seattle (Sea TAC) - SEA @ 9:30. wooo even there is free internet. niceee.
next flight @ 11:25 am (PST) from Terminal A2.\
@ 7:10 land in PHL (philadelphia). Was so wasted with no sleep. Forgot to take the carry on luggage I had. Only realized it when I got out. Ran to the US airways counter and they traced it out for me and got my carry on luggage with the 2nd official lap top and camera.
Then went to baggage claim to get the suitcase. With 3 bags in tow head to the Station for the train to Downtown Philly.
Get down at Market street and the take the 8:55pm connecting train to Penbrook on R5 route. Reach penbrook @9:45pm
Reach home 10pm EST. or 7pm PST.
Feeling hungry, They just don't give anything on the US flights and that kind of sucks for long distance flights.
Was thinking about what Sara said. How she felt a deep connection and that she felt as thou she knew me for a long time. Thou we only met 2 times. Its so strange how people connect. Is it because of the level of sincerity or is it just the nice feeling of security and trust that is invoked?
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
DAY Six of packing and organizing and Moving
******************************************
Tue, May 4, 2010
Lazy day.. wake up @ 5am as usual, but decide to lay low and Enjoy sleeping on the floor. Used the jacket as pillow. With all the stuff taken by the movers the apartment looks like a huge room of nothingness.
Funny how people attach so much importance to bed and great comfortable matters. And I am fine even sleeping on the floor. Felt and was reminded of the time spent out camping with Eva. And some how seem to miss that adventure. The memories of dealing with an Angry Eva seem to be fading... Guess thats life, the bad fades away faster than the Good. Is it just me or is it usually Human. To remember most of the good and pleasant times.
She claims to remember the good times. But her actions don't seem to back up her words. Thats one thing they said about all women. (i think it applys to everyone) that to watch what they do and not what they say.
Did not get to see her online nor any updates on FB. wonder what happened. Hopefully she is safe and doing well.
Asaf expected to come by in the evening to take the TV and also KAye for my fave cooking mate, my DANBY microwave.
Let me get going, have to call up linda, and then head off to the CRA in Surrey as soon as possible and see what I need to do.
It was nice to see that Delma is considering getting back into software after talking with me. So sent her the docs and other material related to SQL and Database. Hope she goes thru them and sees how she feels after going thru them for a month.
8am get call from muhu that he is at honda dealer and will drop by for picking up more of the remaining stuff.
he comes by 9 am and leaves by 9:30...
10am got msg from Bela Sara B. .... she is back from Italy and wants to go out dancing with me... Told her that I would not be having my car for the evening and she was fine lets take the sky train.... woo hooo.. and told her lets meet up for dinner or something before that.. she was like I don't have any money, I am broke and in debt ... ahh I told her its my treat, we need to talk and catch up, its my new job party...
Reluctantly she agreed.... well thats a date with Sara before I take off to Philly...
Some people don't like to call it a date, its just that they are trying to fool themselves into thinking that dating is bad. Dating is not bad, its just two people meeting and if things are ment to happen and there is some special magic that they can see it as going forward and for life long it happens or it just ends with that one date.
Eva never liked to admit that her going out with other guys for BBQ (one on one) or for the movie or for dinner with all the guys she went out with as date. Thou they the guys like to call it A DATE.
And as Amit Jha put it, more so because of his Indian conservativeness that all the white gals are like that (bitches and very low in moral character) and was surprised that he called Eva a Slut because of her dating.. Thats just the way of life in the west! Dude! well may be he will understand after he spends some time out in the west.
Just that eva and many like don't like to admit it because even they judge other people harshly and hence their own reluctance to admit it to themselves and be honest with themselves and accept it at its face value...
Anyways,, off for my Revenue dept and then to call sara and hang out..... she is such a sweet heart.. but am i looking at romantic possibility..????
no, i can't as I am in love with someone else...., and not in a relationship as I got dumped. :) but who knows, the day is still young and the possibilities are endless. Even thou I do not like to date anyone else now as I love Eva dearly and consider it cheating at my own end thou I do not have any moral obligation to her as she was the one who dumped me two times.....
IT to me is my own moral obligation to be honest to myself than to be honest for the sake of someone else.
Come back from surrey and start the last of clean up work. Pack the Microwave up for Kaye . Asaf said will come by at 6pm to pick up the Tv, stand and the microwave.
Got msg from Sara about her visit to the dentist. Ahh why am I leaving Van, when I am suddenly making lots of new good friends and meeting good new people.
3pm.... Mundies guy comes by and picks up my car. feel a sad parting sensation that my car will be away from me for about 2 weeks. hope it reaches philly safely.
Again get a call from Sara, talk for sometime. says her computer is screwed up.
6:00pm Asaf comes by and takes the TV, the 2nd TV stand and micro wave for Kaye. And the remaining food stuff of coke and the cables and the digital box that I paid $100 for at future shop.
7:30 meet up with sara, have Vino and Dinner at Cactus and then go out to the boss to dance non-stop. She is so sweet and so easy to lead. Just follows and don't have to stress thinking about if she will hijack or do something on her own.
Definity one of my Best nights at Atlantis/Boss.
Reached home using the Bus and then from patterson, took a taxi to drop off Sara. And she said that she felt a very strong connection with me too. Wished that I was staying on and disappointed that I am going away in a few hrs. What can I say, Life is strange, we want something, but something different seems to happen. Just have to live and enjoy the moment. I was too choked to say anything. just could not tell her anything to comfort her. But if I make it into a job that is consulting ,, flying in and out during weekends, then I would surely get back to Vancouver.
It was an awesome night to remember., How I wish that I had a job in Vancouver and got to stay on. Well life has its own twists and turns. Got to know very closely 3 wonderful women in two days. And yet ..... the heart is else where. Thats why they say, you fall in love and not choose to love.. When people choose to love, they are trying to artificially do something thats supposed to be natural. And from that comes all the other issues. Because its all caused by the imbalance of nature. Leading to fights, lack of understanding, lies, cheating and what not....
Tue, May 4, 2010
Lazy day.. wake up @ 5am as usual, but decide to lay low and Enjoy sleeping on the floor. Used the jacket as pillow. With all the stuff taken by the movers the apartment looks like a huge room of nothingness.
Funny how people attach so much importance to bed and great comfortable matters. And I am fine even sleeping on the floor. Felt and was reminded of the time spent out camping with Eva. And some how seem to miss that adventure. The memories of dealing with an Angry Eva seem to be fading... Guess thats life, the bad fades away faster than the Good. Is it just me or is it usually Human. To remember most of the good and pleasant times.
She claims to remember the good times. But her actions don't seem to back up her words. Thats one thing they said about all women. (i think it applys to everyone) that to watch what they do and not what they say.
Did not get to see her online nor any updates on FB. wonder what happened. Hopefully she is safe and doing well.
Asaf expected to come by in the evening to take the TV and also KAye for my fave cooking mate, my DANBY microwave.
Let me get going, have to call up linda, and then head off to the CRA in Surrey as soon as possible and see what I need to do.
It was nice to see that Delma is considering getting back into software after talking with me. So sent her the docs and other material related to SQL and Database. Hope she goes thru them and sees how she feels after going thru them for a month.
8am get call from muhu that he is at honda dealer and will drop by for picking up more of the remaining stuff.
he comes by 9 am and leaves by 9:30...
10am got msg from Bela Sara B. .... she is back from Italy and wants to go out dancing with me... Told her that I would not be having my car for the evening and she was fine lets take the sky train.... woo hooo.. and told her lets meet up for dinner or something before that.. she was like I don't have any money, I am broke and in debt ... ahh I told her its my treat, we need to talk and catch up, its my new job party...
Reluctantly she agreed.... well thats a date with Sara before I take off to Philly...
Some people don't like to call it a date, its just that they are trying to fool themselves into thinking that dating is bad. Dating is not bad, its just two people meeting and if things are ment to happen and there is some special magic that they can see it as going forward and for life long it happens or it just ends with that one date.
Eva never liked to admit that her going out with other guys for BBQ (one on one) or for the movie or for dinner with all the guys she went out with as date. Thou they the guys like to call it A DATE.
And as Amit Jha put it, more so because of his Indian conservativeness that all the white gals are like that (bitches and very low in moral character) and was surprised that he called Eva a Slut because of her dating.. Thats just the way of life in the west! Dude! well may be he will understand after he spends some time out in the west.
Just that eva and many like don't like to admit it because even they judge other people harshly and hence their own reluctance to admit it to themselves and be honest with themselves and accept it at its face value...
Anyways,, off for my Revenue dept and then to call sara and hang out..... she is such a sweet heart.. but am i looking at romantic possibility..????
no, i can't as I am in love with someone else...., and not in a relationship as I got dumped. :) but who knows, the day is still young and the possibilities are endless. Even thou I do not like to date anyone else now as I love Eva dearly and consider it cheating at my own end thou I do not have any moral obligation to her as she was the one who dumped me two times.....
IT to me is my own moral obligation to be honest to myself than to be honest for the sake of someone else.
Come back from surrey and start the last of clean up work. Pack the Microwave up for Kaye . Asaf said will come by at 6pm to pick up the Tv, stand and the microwave.
Got msg from Sara about her visit to the dentist. Ahh why am I leaving Van, when I am suddenly making lots of new good friends and meeting good new people.
3pm.... Mundies guy comes by and picks up my car. feel a sad parting sensation that my car will be away from me for about 2 weeks. hope it reaches philly safely.
Again get a call from Sara, talk for sometime. says her computer is screwed up.
6:00pm Asaf comes by and takes the TV, the 2nd TV stand and micro wave for Kaye. And the remaining food stuff of coke and the cables and the digital box that I paid $100 for at future shop.
7:30 meet up with sara, have Vino and Dinner at Cactus and then go out to the boss to dance non-stop. She is so sweet and so easy to lead. Just follows and don't have to stress thinking about if she will hijack or do something on her own.
Definity one of my Best nights at Atlantis/Boss.
Reached home using the Bus and then from patterson, took a taxi to drop off Sara. And she said that she felt a very strong connection with me too. Wished that I was staying on and disappointed that I am going away in a few hrs. What can I say, Life is strange, we want something, but something different seems to happen. Just have to live and enjoy the moment. I was too choked to say anything. just could not tell her anything to comfort her. But if I make it into a job that is consulting ,, flying in and out during weekends, then I would surely get back to Vancouver.
It was an awesome night to remember., How I wish that I had a job in Vancouver and got to stay on. Well life has its own twists and turns. Got to know very closely 3 wonderful women in two days. And yet ..... the heart is else where. Thats why they say, you fall in love and not choose to love.. When people choose to love, they are trying to artificially do something thats supposed to be natural. And from that comes all the other issues. Because its all caused by the imbalance of nature. Leading to fights, lack of understanding, lies, cheating and what not....
Monday, May 3, 2010
DAY Five of packing and organizing and Moving
******************************************
Mon, May 3, 2010
8am Movers coming.
Chat with eva again after seeing her blog about the farm party. Was suddenly reminded of the night mare I had a few days ago. Mail I wanted to send but did not as she does not seem to want to communicate :
**************************
There was another reason why I called.
a few days ago, I had a vision/ dream or what ever you call it... it was bad.
It was about you wearing the chocolate brown pants (that u seem to be wearing and then something green on the top mixed with a brown... and u were also having the light yellowish bag (that u use for going to work in india)....
u are attending a party, lots of guys, drinking and everything.. many of them seem to know you and you them,, friends aquaintance.. you already have a reputation about the kissing thing in Czech and drinking.... and after sometime some of the guys decide to fix your drink... with something called the date rape drug (very commonly available in india and used by many indian guys in the clubs of mumbai that i know). Then after some time one of the guys takes you to the room as the effects of the drug seem to take over and you are behaving desperate and horny... he takes you to the room and do things to you, get you naked and has sex with you ... and after that all his friends all join in one after another, and they take pics of you in the act... then I woke up sweating.
It sounds crazy.... just one bad night mare. But thought that I would share it with you to be careful with the crazy unpredictable guys there.
This kind of incident happened in one of my office parties when I was working in mumbai. But the gal was born and brought up in Mumbai and was too smart, and she does not drink. So those guys I knew were not successful with her.
*****************
Don't know why I am bothering with this, when she does not seem to care about my words or does not seem to be interested in been friends with me either..... I just don't want to have any resentment towards her or anyone. The more I am trying to try, the more she is acting like some power drunk person and acting all ego entric. But again I do care about her for some nice things that she has and the unexplained feeling of love I feel for her and her well begin.
And don't want to end up regretting latter if something happens to her. That I had the opportunity to warn her Naive personalty and did not.
But if she continous in this hate filled way of behavior towards me,, I think even I will soon develop a wall and stop caring about her.
Wonder how she keeps moving from one person to another,, just 55 days ago when I wished her all the best and that its too much of logistic involved to plan a trip to india and go to kerala with her. As she might be with some other guy by then. She was saying, how can I fall for another guy when I have been thru so much suffering with me.....
And as i see it, she fell in love and proposed to Amit all slobering him and scaring him in the first 30 days and now replaced him with Rishit..... wow strange are the working of some peoples brain. Or is it just their short term way of always looking at relationships.. would that explain why she did not or was not able to have any relationship that lasts more than a month?????... well I did try to warn her about Igor...
And when I see the pics of Rishit, his expression remind me of Igors when he is about to pounce on a new victim. And her expressions are the same as she had when she was going behind igor.. with her "mastero, mastero...."... Well for some people history repeats..... the cycle of karma continues, untill such time that they learn from their actions and its results...
Atleast I am not able to consider anyone and don't feel like considering anyone. That maybe because I am in love and she is able to do it cause she was never in love,, or just pretended to be in love or did not know what really love is.
Well atleast I was and still am sincere and honest and continue to be so.
Thou there have been opportunities and lots of windows seem to open around me. Especially with the Call center building that I am located in and with all the beautiful blonds floating around..... thou my heart like any man would love to jump into the sack with them,,, my hearts sincerity and love for someone who does not seem care about me at all,,, does not allow me too. Strange paradox or true sincere love.
Or is it that she is addicted to kissing. There are many who are addicted to sex and it drives them crazy if they don't have sex. She I guess is a person with an addiciton to kissing and wanting to be kissed...... a thought that was there before but just put in writing...
The saddest part of all this is, that she got caught and cornered in her web of lies and instead of showing any regret or remorse or feeling sorry, she truned it around and made it my fault. Well some people are really good at fooling themselves and really believing that others are at fault even after getting caught red handed. What causes this, no idea.
But had she had some kind of remorse or felt sorry for lying so blantedly, I would have been just happy for her and would have loved to get back with her. But she decided to go with counter accusation and make me look like the bad guy here and accuse me of creating imaginary stories and sending emails to my friend complaining to him about me been the villan... how sorry a state of mind that she must have been.
Maybe its all the sudden change in location, cultural shock and her master plan and desire to be with Amit backfiring, scared her to make up her own stories and then accuse me of creating stories.... what ever. But I just hope that she realises that I do not intend any harm to her.... Harm is the easiest and cheapest thing I could have done to her. But that is not me.
But looking at the way things are going and even after I swallow my own ego and approach her to make things better and ease of the tensions and let her know that I forgive her for the games she played (was surprised when she labeled that I was playing a bad game,,,,, shocked that she thought of all this as a game)... and only want to forgive and but the bad past behind. Does not seem to be getting across. Well atleast I am guilt free and sleeping with a clear conscious.
now off to Canada revenue and then latter to Muhus house for a party...
The movers came in around 7:45am and were gone by 9am.. that was fast.. now to coordinate the car drop off.
had Chicken biriyani for the last time in Van,, hmmm will miss Al-watans friday special biriyani....
Delma calls around 2 pm and we plan on meeting up and going for a movie...
Got to know that Delma, so pretty, zero make up, looks like the ideal beautiful malu gal. is a computer science graduate and also studied law.... wooow talk about high qualification and under used talent..... How come I did not meet her before... whyyyy.. she and me could have made such a wonderful pair.... she is so beautiful and down to earth and so religious too... Why do I end up meeting people who take me for granted and the good ones always turn up when I have no scope of pursing. As I am moving away...
Well it was nice meeting her and getting to know her. Will have to surely help her in anyway possible. Even if its from Philly. Thats one lady who could really use my caring help and be grateful to me eternally and not stab me in the back like the others, who do not even seem to appreciate the blind love I am and caring them for... Talk about mis-placed affections...
anyways we watch the movie. then go for bubble tea and I drop her off at her new house besides ,,,Polish hall. And it is so easy for her to go out Salsa dancing every friday.
around 7 pm got to meet Jennifer the new manager of Dunblane and she turns out to be a Archelogist for and specialization in First nation... wow, that was nice to meet two ladies who are very highly educated and smart.. but doing min wages work for survival... so sad but I hope and pray that persistence with guide them to higher levels of achievements in life.
Mon, May 3, 2010
8am Movers coming.
Chat with eva again after seeing her blog about the farm party. Was suddenly reminded of the night mare I had a few days ago. Mail I wanted to send but did not as she does not seem to want to communicate :
**************************
There was another reason why I called.
a few days ago, I had a vision/ dream or what ever you call it... it was bad.
It was about you wearing the chocolate brown pants (that u seem to be wearing and then something green on the top mixed with a brown... and u were also having the light yellowish bag (that u use for going to work in india)....
u are attending a party, lots of guys, drinking and everything.. many of them seem to know you and you them,, friends aquaintance.. you already have a reputation about the kissing thing in Czech and drinking.... and after sometime some of the guys decide to fix your drink... with something called the date rape drug (very commonly available in india and used by many indian guys in the clubs of mumbai that i know). Then after some time one of the guys takes you to the room as the effects of the drug seem to take over and you are behaving desperate and horny... he takes you to the room and do things to you, get you naked and has sex with you ... and after that all his friends all join in one after another, and they take pics of you in the act... then I woke up sweating.
It sounds crazy.... just one bad night mare. But thought that I would share it with you to be careful with the crazy unpredictable guys there.
This kind of incident happened in one of my office parties when I was working in mumbai. But the gal was born and brought up in Mumbai and was too smart, and she does not drink. So those guys I knew were not successful with her.
*****************
Don't know why I am bothering with this, when she does not seem to care about my words or does not seem to be interested in been friends with me either..... I just don't want to have any resentment towards her or anyone. The more I am trying to try, the more she is acting like some power drunk person and acting all ego entric. But again I do care about her for some nice things that she has and the unexplained feeling of love I feel for her and her well begin.
And don't want to end up regretting latter if something happens to her. That I had the opportunity to warn her Naive personalty and did not.
But if she continous in this hate filled way of behavior towards me,, I think even I will soon develop a wall and stop caring about her.
Wonder how she keeps moving from one person to another,, just 55 days ago when I wished her all the best and that its too much of logistic involved to plan a trip to india and go to kerala with her. As she might be with some other guy by then. She was saying, how can I fall for another guy when I have been thru so much suffering with me.....
And as i see it, she fell in love and proposed to Amit all slobering him and scaring him in the first 30 days and now replaced him with Rishit..... wow strange are the working of some peoples brain. Or is it just their short term way of always looking at relationships.. would that explain why she did not or was not able to have any relationship that lasts more than a month?????... well I did try to warn her about Igor...
And when I see the pics of Rishit, his expression remind me of Igors when he is about to pounce on a new victim. And her expressions are the same as she had when she was going behind igor.. with her "mastero, mastero...."... Well for some people history repeats..... the cycle of karma continues, untill such time that they learn from their actions and its results...
Atleast I am not able to consider anyone and don't feel like considering anyone. That maybe because I am in love and she is able to do it cause she was never in love,, or just pretended to be in love or did not know what really love is.
Well atleast I was and still am sincere and honest and continue to be so.
Thou there have been opportunities and lots of windows seem to open around me. Especially with the Call center building that I am located in and with all the beautiful blonds floating around..... thou my heart like any man would love to jump into the sack with them,,, my hearts sincerity and love for someone who does not seem care about me at all,,, does not allow me too. Strange paradox or true sincere love.
Or is it that she is addicted to kissing. There are many who are addicted to sex and it drives them crazy if they don't have sex. She I guess is a person with an addiciton to kissing and wanting to be kissed...... a thought that was there before but just put in writing...
The saddest part of all this is, that she got caught and cornered in her web of lies and instead of showing any regret or remorse or feeling sorry, she truned it around and made it my fault. Well some people are really good at fooling themselves and really believing that others are at fault even after getting caught red handed. What causes this, no idea.
But had she had some kind of remorse or felt sorry for lying so blantedly, I would have been just happy for her and would have loved to get back with her. But she decided to go with counter accusation and make me look like the bad guy here and accuse me of creating imaginary stories and sending emails to my friend complaining to him about me been the villan... how sorry a state of mind that she must have been.
Maybe its all the sudden change in location, cultural shock and her master plan and desire to be with Amit backfiring, scared her to make up her own stories and then accuse me of creating stories.... what ever. But I just hope that she realises that I do not intend any harm to her.... Harm is the easiest and cheapest thing I could have done to her. But that is not me.
But looking at the way things are going and even after I swallow my own ego and approach her to make things better and ease of the tensions and let her know that I forgive her for the games she played (was surprised when she labeled that I was playing a bad game,,,,, shocked that she thought of all this as a game)... and only want to forgive and but the bad past behind. Does not seem to be getting across. Well atleast I am guilt free and sleeping with a clear conscious.
now off to Canada revenue and then latter to Muhus house for a party...
The movers came in around 7:45am and were gone by 9am.. that was fast.. now to coordinate the car drop off.
had Chicken biriyani for the last time in Van,, hmmm will miss Al-watans friday special biriyani....
Delma calls around 2 pm and we plan on meeting up and going for a movie...
Got to know that Delma, so pretty, zero make up, looks like the ideal beautiful malu gal. is a computer science graduate and also studied law.... wooow talk about high qualification and under used talent..... How come I did not meet her before... whyyyy.. she and me could have made such a wonderful pair.... she is so beautiful and down to earth and so religious too... Why do I end up meeting people who take me for granted and the good ones always turn up when I have no scope of pursing. As I am moving away...
Well it was nice meeting her and getting to know her. Will have to surely help her in anyway possible. Even if its from Philly. Thats one lady who could really use my caring help and be grateful to me eternally and not stab me in the back like the others, who do not even seem to appreciate the blind love I am and caring them for... Talk about mis-placed affections...
anyways we watch the movie. then go for bubble tea and I drop her off at her new house besides ,,,Polish hall. And it is so easy for her to go out Salsa dancing every friday.
around 7 pm got to meet Jennifer the new manager of Dunblane and she turns out to be a Archelogist for and specialization in First nation... wow, that was nice to meet two ladies who are very highly educated and smart.. but doing min wages work for survival... so sad but I hope and pray that persistence with guide them to higher levels of achievements in life.
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