Apr 21 2014.. LA

Monday Apr 21 2014


Was supposed to be in LA today,,,, but fate mysteriously played its own game, delayed the documents I was supposed to have received and so had to cancel the trip.

Is the universe trying to tell me something!!!!

was hoping to meet the gal with the butterfly smile and lollipop hands..... but she never turned up for salsa or was not there when I got there.

,,, so what does that all mean... what is the mystery that life is trying to unravel.

Have been out dancing ... met the other beginners dancers who seem to be feeling the loving vibrations from me.... its like I have gotten a bit more braver and carefree ,,, falling in kind of a love with someones smile.

It was interesting to get to  hear "I like you" from the lady with the beautiful eyes.. felt a bit nervous that I might be misleading her as I was just dancing in happiness most of the time imagining that I was with the gal with the butterfly smile. Luckily was able to sneak in the information about my moving off to LA and could see the disappointment on her face. But glad that it did not go anywhere to end up hurting people.

It feels strange to be the center of attention from so many gals ,,,,, while my brain is swirling with the images of the butter fly smile... and my whole body is trembling with happiness like I have never known before.
All this cause of some physical attraction to someone who I will probably be never seeing again...
And for some reason, I am seeing her beauty in every gal I look at and guess the others are seeing the twinkling stars in my eyes....

But then why , why, why was I not allowed to fly out today,,,,, if it was not meant to happen. why ... but in a good way, after about 4 years I am able to feel the feelings of love ,, no overflowing love.. especially after the pain of cruel betrayal that I tried to endure..... It was funny to see e's friend send me a mail saying that she wishes to un-friend me on face book as she felt uncomfortable... ahh for trying to remind me about all the pain I went thru day and night the past 4 years or was it 5 years of grieving for falling for the bad person.

Atleast it feels good to be paying attention to someone who has thus far proved to be worthy of my attention now. With her honest replies to my mail and in her own ways of showing that she is a caring person. Who would run up behind me in -10 deg freezing weather to say she is sorry, just because our interaction felt weird.... that showed some real class of caring character of the person, so much different from been treated as unworthy person by the last...

" The Girl with the Butterfly Smile "

A smile so beautiful,, that every time she smiled.... butterflies just fluttered and danced around in joy.... sunlight bounced of their wings such that it made the northern lights look pale .....

The lights twisted, turned, bounced of the million soft wings in heavenly splendor...

Oh Girl with the Butter Fly Smile you make me feel so Shy...

Dreams and thoughts I am filled with
that my eyes are always twinkling with stars

Your lovely round baby eyes
filled with gentle innocence just flushes my heart

The touch of your Soft cheeks feels
soothing and nourishing to my soul.

,,,ohhhh if only god was human, he would probably understand that its not right to emotionally torture people...