Thursday, Oct 25 2012
As expected got the dreaded Notice of 5 weeks.
Well like everything that you come across face to face, even thou you been thru it before and are expecting it. It fuels the lousy feelings more than its already been experienced when its just all in your mind.
The material impact sure is a fuel as its coming with your other senses getting to experience it and then it comes to hit you with a D-Date.
What exactly is causing me to think of it and dreading it, what is it that I am fearing?
As much as I like to claim, there is a huge part of me thats not willing to do minimum wages jobs. I want to work smarter and contribute to the development of self and my surrounding better with what I believe to be my skills, suited for jobs in the industry. Something that would give me a feeling of self recognization and also gives me enough confidence to hold my head up high and not be belittled by snobs and other ego maniacs. Something that would make the people who I love and who love me, look up with pride and feelings of great achievement in my actions and been associated to me.
It is ofcouse with pride everyone talks about the ones we are related to when we hear of their accomplishments. And in many a cases do not want to talk about relatives who have not done good to the society at large.
Its just like every human, that I want to be liked by people.
Been liked and loved has it own wonderful feeling.
Kind of reminded of the lil babies and dogs loving me of showing actions of liking me with out even a word been spoken.
ITs like the theory of we all been masses of energy, sending of vibrations and frequencies of goodness or not so good. And then suddenly when we meet people who match our frequency there is the
Thursday, October 25, 2012
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
Oct 24 2012 !!?? sums up start of today
Wednesday, Oct 24 2012
Tried to get up early.
It was nice going for a great walk and run about 3.3 miles in 45 mins after a brief work out yesterday.
Now got to get cracking on updating some of my tech skills and see how I can monetize on that.
FB delight.
Tried to get up early.
It was nice going for a great walk and run about 3.3 miles in 45 mins after a brief work out yesterday.
Now got to get cracking on updating some of my tech skills and see how I can monetize on that.
FB delight.
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Oct 23 2012
Tusday Oct 23 2012
"""A roadblock of sorts will appear in the second half of the month as the Sun moves into Scorpio on October 23. In and of itself, this transit simply represents a change of focus. In this case, however, the Sun is activating the very same traits Saturn is trying to reign in. Adding to this tension, the Sun will butt heads with Saturn on October 25, leaving you feeling a bit downbeat and intensely secretive.""
Got a call for an opening, but they were looking for someone with lots of Manager exp.
Bummer again.
Got another call,,, asking me to be ready to receive the 5 week notice from HR.
Here we go again, held at ransom of the world and its crazy twists and turns.
Depressing feeling sweeping over me, the weather not helping either with its gloomy over cast of clouds.
A bit scared thinking of the hard time I had in Canada been unemployed and worrying to pay my bills. Hate to go back to India and face up to the red-neck characters who are among the village relatives.
Kind of really feeling sick now, mostly the dread of the unknown, fear of hitting lows and becoming dependent on others. Not the way I would like to live.
Who else to blame, other than self. Reasoning can be so diverse. Could end up blaming myself and feeling bad about the choices I made on the opportunities I must have done different.
But then again in the same way able to reason that, given the circumstances of laziness, lack of motivation, lack of concrete will, I would probably have made the same call.
"""A roadblock of sorts will appear in the second half of the month as the Sun moves into Scorpio on October 23. In and of itself, this transit simply represents a change of focus. In this case, however, the Sun is activating the very same traits Saturn is trying to reign in. Adding to this tension, the Sun will butt heads with Saturn on October 25, leaving you feeling a bit downbeat and intensely secretive.""
Got a call for an opening, but they were looking for someone with lots of Manager exp.
Bummer again.
Got another call,,, asking me to be ready to receive the 5 week notice from HR.
Here we go again, held at ransom of the world and its crazy twists and turns.
Depressing feeling sweeping over me, the weather not helping either with its gloomy over cast of clouds.
A bit scared thinking of the hard time I had in Canada been unemployed and worrying to pay my bills. Hate to go back to India and face up to the red-neck characters who are among the village relatives.
Kind of really feeling sick now, mostly the dread of the unknown, fear of hitting lows and becoming dependent on others. Not the way I would like to live.
Who else to blame, other than self. Reasoning can be so diverse. Could end up blaming myself and feeling bad about the choices I made on the opportunities I must have done different.
But then again in the same way able to reason that, given the circumstances of laziness, lack of motivation, lack of concrete will, I would probably have made the same call.
Monday, October 22, 2012
Oct 22 Monday weekend summary
Monday Oct 22 2012
got the PP. now to get cracking on the immigration related issues.
Towards evening got out and went for the buddhist meditation secession, its been having a good effect on me and just listening to other share their experience in a wonderful way of trust is heart warming.
Went salsa dancing after and was surprised when a gal I had danced with, at brasil, couple of weeks ago on a wonderful cumbai, came over and said that her friend and taken a video of us dancing. Was excited and wanted that video as I wanted to see how I looked dancing a cumbia... So after dancing with her a bit, asked her if she could send it to me and I could give her my email. She said she has it on her facebook and asked me if I had one. I said yes and that we should exchange ids or I could give her my email and she could add me or I could add her if she gave me her id.
A bit latter, I got busy dancing with one of the sweet beginners and when I got back she was gone.. her name was Loraine or Laurine or something like that. She sure is very exotic and beautiful. Seems to have a kind of sensual aura about her with the poise that reminds of princess and royalty.
That was bummer... ahhhh well life sure does bait me and us all in different ways. cheers
Sunday Oct 21 2012
Woke up to a weird sound . Found out that it was the hot air baloon that was floating up above that was having hot air ignited or flared or what ever it is called that they do when they are already in the air.
Then heard some loud speaker comentary and realised that it must be the annual marathon. Went out and saw the last of the runner enter in about 1hr 30 mins latter.. on a 13 kms run. It was inspiring, felt like running.
Saturday Oct 20 2012
Went for the 12 miles hike.. about 20 kms. was not as much exhausted or tired after that, must be the bit of running and walking that I have been doing.
Had gone there with about 5 hrs sleep. had come back from a not so exciting salsa dancing night, went to sleep around 3am or 4 hike was at 11am. woke up around 8 or 9 am.
got the PP. now to get cracking on the immigration related issues.
Towards evening got out and went for the buddhist meditation secession, its been having a good effect on me and just listening to other share their experience in a wonderful way of trust is heart warming.
Went salsa dancing after and was surprised when a gal I had danced with, at brasil, couple of weeks ago on a wonderful cumbai, came over and said that her friend and taken a video of us dancing. Was excited and wanted that video as I wanted to see how I looked dancing a cumbia... So after dancing with her a bit, asked her if she could send it to me and I could give her my email. She said she has it on her facebook and asked me if I had one. I said yes and that we should exchange ids or I could give her my email and she could add me or I could add her if she gave me her id.
A bit latter, I got busy dancing with one of the sweet beginners and when I got back she was gone.. her name was Loraine or Laurine or something like that. She sure is very exotic and beautiful. Seems to have a kind of sensual aura about her with the poise that reminds of princess and royalty.
That was bummer... ahhhh well life sure does bait me and us all in different ways. cheers
Sunday Oct 21 2012
Woke up to a weird sound . Found out that it was the hot air baloon that was floating up above that was having hot air ignited or flared or what ever it is called that they do when they are already in the air.
Then heard some loud speaker comentary and realised that it must be the annual marathon. Went out and saw the last of the runner enter in about 1hr 30 mins latter.. on a 13 kms run. It was inspiring, felt like running.
Saturday Oct 20 2012
Went for the 12 miles hike.. about 20 kms. was not as much exhausted or tired after that, must be the bit of running and walking that I have been doing.
Had gone there with about 5 hrs sleep. had come back from a not so exciting salsa dancing night, went to sleep around 3am or 4 hike was at 11am. woke up around 8 or 9 am.
Friday, October 19, 2012
Oct 19 2012 Friday..Govt people and politics
Friday, Oct 19 2012
Does every nation need to have a common External enemy so that its Hyper energetic population (more brawn than brain) does not end up focusing their energies on the current Government/Rulers !!!???
Makes sense then when rulers elected or otherwise, tend to set up the population to believe that there is a common enemy, External, that is a threat to them. And keep feeding information and build up the Enemy into much bigger Threat than they really are.
Makes it easier, on a lager or wider point of view, that it is in the Internal interest of the Nation/group to have that Common enemy occupy the thoughts of the people rather than the Internal issues plaguing the Nation / group.
Thoughts on the Internal Issues, which also could lead up to Internal chaos, fights, splits happening with in the Nation/Group based on differing ideology and beliefs.
One of the best examples is that of the multi-cultural, multi-racial (Aryans[european origin majority], Dravidian [aborginals mostly having DNA linked to the first man from Africa], Monglos [about 8 or the 30 states bordering china...]).
How can a Govt hold this group of diverse groups who are proud of their own heritage together?
Having a very common enemy - Pakistan.
Churning out tons of propaganda and keeping the news industry active with stories of fear and insecurity constantly going. On occasional even sponsoring some negative events with collateral damage written off for the greater good of keeping the majority population safer and together.
Does every nation need to have a common External enemy so that its Hyper energetic population (more brawn than brain) does not end up focusing their energies on the current Government/Rulers !!!???
Makes sense then when rulers elected or otherwise, tend to set up the population to believe that there is a common enemy, External, that is a threat to them. And keep feeding information and build up the Enemy into much bigger Threat than they really are.
Makes it easier, on a lager or wider point of view, that it is in the Internal interest of the Nation/group to have that Common enemy occupy the thoughts of the people rather than the Internal issues plaguing the Nation / group.
Thoughts on the Internal Issues, which also could lead up to Internal chaos, fights, splits happening with in the Nation/Group based on differing ideology and beliefs.
One of the best examples is that of the multi-cultural, multi-racial (Aryans[european origin majority], Dravidian [aborginals mostly having DNA linked to the first man from Africa], Monglos [about 8 or the 30 states bordering china...]).
How can a Govt hold this group of diverse groups who are proud of their own heritage together?
Having a very common enemy - Pakistan.
Churning out tons of propaganda and keeping the news industry active with stories of fear and insecurity constantly going. On occasional even sponsoring some negative events with collateral damage written off for the greater good of keeping the majority population safer and together.
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Oct 18 2012 fixed window shade
Thrusday, Oct 18 2012
Tried to get up early. but ended up getting out of bed only around 8:30am... damm motivation.
Maintence came and fixed the window with a new shade. now I am able to open it smoothly.
Tried to get up early. but ended up getting out of bed only around 8:30am... damm motivation.
Maintence came and fixed the window with a new shade. now I am able to open it smoothly.
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Oct 17 2012 Waiting Wednesday
Wednesday Oct 17 2012
Its been a long wait and no sign of the light or end of tunnel.
Set up payments for the month.
Was interesting to watch the debate online yesterday while also baking tilapia. :)
Interesting write up :
Its been a long wait and no sign of the light or end of tunnel.
Set up payments for the month.
Was interesting to watch the debate online yesterday while also baking tilapia. :)
Interesting write up :
| Dating is about finding someone who shares similar emotional issues and baggage. If you're a Type A and they're a Type B, things won't work out so well. Instead, richness and profundity are where it's at. Everything will settle when your intentions are versatile. |
Guess its all about finding that one person who I think will make my life better and worth waking up each day "Happily" to become a better person and that person thinks that I will make her life better and is worth waking up each day "Happily" to become a better person.
went running and before that had a had work out.
Hoping to wake up early tomorrow.
went running and before that had a had work out.
Hoping to wake up early tomorrow.
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