Saturday, 04 Sep 2010
---------------------
Got home around 2:30 and went to sleep around 3:30am, What a night, slowly able to open myself and able to feel the connection with others. jena was on to me, she is the gal from monday salsa.
Then there was this amazing connection with another gal, I never got her name in the loud noise, as we were getting to chat, some other guy comes and asks her to dance, she seemed reluctant to go and was touched my the expression on her face, "don't go, I will be back soon". And like a scared fool, I just walked away to the bar and had a beer. Guess I am still scared to connect and open up on the dance floor.
Booked flight to Madrid for the Friday of Oct 1 friday and return on Oct 17sunday.
Glad that there is a direct flight from PHL to MAD, just about 7.5 hrs. :)
Off to downtown Philly for some culture and US history.
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Friday, September 3, 2010
Sep 03, Friday
Friday , Sep 03 2o10
--------------------
made it to work by 7:10am.
got on to the last of the KT knowledge transfers... the parking lot was almost very empty,, long weekend syndrome.
Gave sweta a lecture on using the infrastructure at her disposal and how fortunate she is to have the hardware at her disposal. As again today she just logged on around 7pm EST, thats like 4:30pm IST, just before I came.... well upto her.
was wondering what she did from 9am to 4:30pm.
Got back to trying to solve the issue with the bug. but realized that my comp was just 40 GB hdd and 1 gb ram. when I compared it to the 160 GB and 4GB ram the others were having.
I had just 2GB of free disk space, send Ajit the message and he asked me to go to the PC station.. around 1:30 I went to the PC station only to be told that I have the max gigs for that model and that I would need a newer comp model. And that they are no longer giving it out as they have a budget freeze.
And if my unit has the budget they need to buy it and they would do the necessary imaging of the comps.
Was using Ashis m/c which was flying compared to mine. ahhh even the lap top i brought a year ago has 4gB ram and 500GB hdd. grrrr which freaking world are these people living in, after all the money they steal from poor sick people with their inflated costs for the drugs.
Ashis starts working at de=bugging my issue, as my comp ended up getting only .5 MB ,, not GB memory remaing after they give me 2GB or extra RAM.
So was transfering files to network servers to store.
Ashis fixes the issue and then we were all set to go.....
sent myself the enhanced code.
And then with all kinds of discussion and insecurity of the job and roles been thrown around,, with the new guy Anoy been told that he is no longer required in the project,,, and then rajan been also been hinted at that by bach ,,, it was really a mad house,,, I am glad that I am not in aji's place to handle all these indian pshycos.
got out with everyone leaving about 5pm with the code to modified soon.. tested it on ashis m/c and it seems to work fine.
got home and called up Malini and we had a very funny talk.. lets see if she makes it to Salsa tonite.
She is such a princess.. well she sure seems to be born and brought up as one.. and she is doing a good job at living on her own. Not the way I would like to live,, as I am more a guy who lives with the minimum of luxury and requirements. That is something that made me love eva as she did not have much of a luxury requirement for living.
Thou Mali seems down to earth and did not seem to have lot of make up on, she is still someone who is used to a lot of luxury and staying only in the best hotels in the world.... not someone like EVA who can just about adjust to any place and live. but again Mali seems to be more in control of herself, in great control of her emotions and able to hold a very intelligent and mature conversation with every one.
Ahhhhh thats life..... as much as her princess y upbringing turns me off, her trying to live her life on her own seems to impress me.
well if she makes it to salsa tonite fine, or I am anyways going,, already drunk on two shots of whiskey and coke....
yeaaaa its 8pm and I am going to get ready and drive off for some hot salsa..
Best news came from Vaughn for the Oct3 to oct8.. yeaaaaa Jumping with happienss
--------------------
made it to work by 7:10am.
got on to the last of the KT knowledge transfers... the parking lot was almost very empty,, long weekend syndrome.
Gave sweta a lecture on using the infrastructure at her disposal and how fortunate she is to have the hardware at her disposal. As again today she just logged on around 7pm EST, thats like 4:30pm IST, just before I came.... well upto her.
was wondering what she did from 9am to 4:30pm.
Got back to trying to solve the issue with the bug. but realized that my comp was just 40 GB hdd and 1 gb ram. when I compared it to the 160 GB and 4GB ram the others were having.
I had just 2GB of free disk space, send Ajit the message and he asked me to go to the PC station.. around 1:30 I went to the PC station only to be told that I have the max gigs for that model and that I would need a newer comp model. And that they are no longer giving it out as they have a budget freeze.
And if my unit has the budget they need to buy it and they would do the necessary imaging of the comps.
Was using Ashis m/c which was flying compared to mine. ahhh even the lap top i brought a year ago has 4gB ram and 500GB hdd. grrrr which freaking world are these people living in, after all the money they steal from poor sick people with their inflated costs for the drugs.
Ashis starts working at de=bugging my issue, as my comp ended up getting only .5 MB ,, not GB memory remaing after they give me 2GB or extra RAM.
So was transfering files to network servers to store.
Ashis fixes the issue and then we were all set to go.....
sent myself the enhanced code.
And then with all kinds of discussion and insecurity of the job and roles been thrown around,, with the new guy Anoy been told that he is no longer required in the project,,, and then rajan been also been hinted at that by bach ,,, it was really a mad house,,, I am glad that I am not in aji's place to handle all these indian pshycos.
got out with everyone leaving about 5pm with the code to modified soon.. tested it on ashis m/c and it seems to work fine.
got home and called up Malini and we had a very funny talk.. lets see if she makes it to Salsa tonite.
She is such a princess.. well she sure seems to be born and brought up as one.. and she is doing a good job at living on her own. Not the way I would like to live,, as I am more a guy who lives with the minimum of luxury and requirements. That is something that made me love eva as she did not have much of a luxury requirement for living.
Thou Mali seems down to earth and did not seem to have lot of make up on, she is still someone who is used to a lot of luxury and staying only in the best hotels in the world.... not someone like EVA who can just about adjust to any place and live. but again Mali seems to be more in control of herself, in great control of her emotions and able to hold a very intelligent and mature conversation with every one.
Ahhhhh thats life..... as much as her princess y upbringing turns me off, her trying to live her life on her own seems to impress me.
well if she makes it to salsa tonite fine, or I am anyways going,, already drunk on two shots of whiskey and coke....
yeaaaa its 8pm and I am going to get ready and drive off for some hot salsa..
Best news came from Vaughn for the Oct3 to oct8.. yeaaaaa Jumping with happienss
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Sep 02, Thursday
Thursday Sep 02, 2010
---------------------
trying to come to grips with focusing on my own self and self improvement.
Yesterday again got lazy after watching bachelor pad and did not go for a run. forgot to have dinner, then around 10:40 saw the missed call from malini which came in around 9:10pm.
Anyways today made it out with just having a cup of coffee. Packed granola from Costco to eat at work. need to get back to eating breakfast and dinner.
Vaughn sent me a mail about not been able to accomodate Oct1st week. dammm.
lets see how it goes.
was doing the last of the knowledge transfers - KT from 7 to 9..... not sure what that gal in bangalore is really doing, I asked her to practice making calls and the call transfer and she seems to log on only around 6am my time, just one hr before I came in to show that she is doing something. well I can only guide not order and be a dictator, its up to her.
was assigned a buy that I thought that I had fixed. was having issues with tools. so got lost in that , even thou the QC team was expecting me to fix it immediately.
still pissed off at my leave getting postponed.
don't remember much of what happened as I am entering this on sep 3rd.. remember going to sleep tired after trying to connect to work servers from home into 10 and 11 pm.
---------------------
trying to come to grips with focusing on my own self and self improvement.
Yesterday again got lazy after watching bachelor pad and did not go for a run. forgot to have dinner, then around 10:40 saw the missed call from malini which came in around 9:10pm.
Anyways today made it out with just having a cup of coffee. Packed granola from Costco to eat at work. need to get back to eating breakfast and dinner.
Vaughn sent me a mail about not been able to accomodate Oct1st week. dammm.
lets see how it goes.
was doing the last of the knowledge transfers - KT from 7 to 9..... not sure what that gal in bangalore is really doing, I asked her to practice making calls and the call transfer and she seems to log on only around 6am my time, just one hr before I came in to show that she is doing something. well I can only guide not order and be a dictator, its up to her.
was assigned a buy that I thought that I had fixed. was having issues with tools. so got lost in that , even thou the QC team was expecting me to fix it immediately.
still pissed off at my leave getting postponed.
don't remember much of what happened as I am entering this on sep 3rd.. remember going to sleep tired after trying to connect to work servers from home into 10 and 11 pm.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Sep 01, Wed, day of waiting
Wednesday, 01 Sep 2010
----------------------
Got up early with the pressure of havig to get to Shwetha for completing CATS. Reached work around 7:03am... was able to sneak in a few pushups and stomach crunchs. Drank in the half cup of hot microwaved ginger tea... the diluted ginger tasted yummy.
Was on the phone and net meeting with screen sharing. by 8:30 we were able to complete her time sheet filling up in CATS. phew!
Went to dunkin doughnuts and got a box of munchkins. 25..
got to start eating for breakfast.
10 to 11 weekly meeting. told sangi about the moc and avay team having a end-to end testing today afternoon and asking li to add me to the demo.
12:30 went lunch and back by 1:30
3pm the test was successfull for the end-to end testing on dev. denny made a few modifications in the avay side and the re-test worked... successful
Karti was also there testing my code fix for the associate button and he found out a bug in that,, ,, aahhhh now I need to fix that, I thought that was fixed, got to see how it works.
Around 4:30pm gave a all get and still waiting at 7pm for that to finish.
Saw that few people from Van are heading to NEW York for Salsa congreso...well that gives my long week end something to do. cheers
----------------------
Got up early with the pressure of havig to get to Shwetha for completing CATS. Reached work around 7:03am... was able to sneak in a few pushups and stomach crunchs. Drank in the half cup of hot microwaved ginger tea... the diluted ginger tasted yummy.
Was on the phone and net meeting with screen sharing. by 8:30 we were able to complete her time sheet filling up in CATS. phew!
Went to dunkin doughnuts and got a box of munchkins. 25..
got to start eating for breakfast.
10 to 11 weekly meeting. told sangi about the moc and avay team having a end-to end testing today afternoon and asking li to add me to the demo.
12:30 went lunch and back by 1:30
3pm the test was successfull for the end-to end testing on dev. denny made a few modifications in the avay side and the re-test worked... successful
Karti was also there testing my code fix for the associate button and he found out a bug in that,, ,, aahhhh now I need to fix that, I thought that was fixed, got to see how it works.
Around 4:30pm gave a all get and still waiting at 7pm for that to finish.
Saw that few people from Van are heading to NEW York for Salsa congreso...well that gives my long week end something to do. cheers
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Aug 31, Tues, happines within
Tuesday , Aug 31 2010
---------------------
After a great monday night out salsa dancing at the Vango, was finding it tough to get up. Danced with all a bunch of people, mostly got asked by others to dance than me asking any.
Still feel my confidence and self esteem is at its low after the way Eva has been behaving/behaved with me. With me making efforts to smooth out the negativeity and her only trying to focus on just the negativitiy.
Well i tired like no man has ever, if she is just showing to me and her self that what she tries to show the outter world as a person into all kinds of philosophical and positive reading and posting on the blog and then goes on to the opposite of what she writes, then for sure she is not really who she portrays herself to be. Even to her self.
and like a fool instead of just ignoring sick people, I tend to get more concerned and want to do good to someone who is just ungrateful for all that I have done and sacrificed. Maybe its because I care too much,,,,, have to learn to care less for such people. But again the argument comes up, they are part of your life and you choose to take a chance. Is it bad on my own character to give up easily?..... or should I be as cold hearted as them?
It surely is affecting my own self-esteem and I am taking in her negative energy and looking at myself as a bad person. When in fact its the other way around, she is the one who is negative and still swimming in all kinds of fake, shallow, superficial show off state of mind.
Sure all her travel is great conversation material and to be made to feel great about it by people who are not into traveling to exotic places. Other than that, how can there be any spiritual growth when the foundation on which one is doing the travel is based on trying to just show off to less fortunate people.
As someone said, its " A real man doesn't love a million girls. He loves one girl in a million ways."
Thats also true to what ever one does, its does not matter how many different places in the world we travel in, as long as we can find happiness in one place, that is what matters. And that one place is within us, not at different places in the world.
So the same thing applies to me, I have to focus on my own happiness instead of trying to feel happy by trying to make someone else happy. All my actions seem to be try to please others and then feel happy if they are happy. And end up pushing my own requirements and happiness to the back.
Have to get back to focusing on my own self, appreciate all the good people with their positive energy and feel better about my own self worth and do good.
7:10 got on the issue of logging on to the test machines with Sweta. was over by 9am.
Got to pay rent, bills, ,,, send mail to vaughn systems.
Got msg from Aji regaring negotiating with Sangi for my leave. Looks like Sep10th is a no go as there is SIT (system integration test) starting for 2 weeks from Sep13. :(
Best possible dates seem to be latter on. need to now check to see flights and climate. don't want to go in any snowy conditions.
Got to decide, is it going to be just spain or just Czech? given evas attitude of treating me like an enemy, don't feel comfortable going there and then having to face the hostile behavior. Rather go alone and enjoy by my own.
around 11:40 got msg from Ajay about going out for dosa at dosa hut :) wanted to go home and get the docs and pay the rent. decicded to go for dosa and latter came back and around 2:10 went home. got the docs.
Send mail to Vaughn about new dates request and sorry for the earlier one on Sep 12.
Back to office and meeting around 3pm-4.
off work after sending in the Expense report and sheets to Prida .. then send fax for the receiptes to be uploaded via the system
Wanted to go out running, but was so lost, fell on to the couch after eating and woke up around 12.
Getting lazy and stressed out about this Euro trip. Had sent out email to Vaughn regarding new possible dates. Have to wait for approval again before making the next move.
---------------------
After a great monday night out salsa dancing at the Vango, was finding it tough to get up. Danced with all a bunch of people, mostly got asked by others to dance than me asking any.
Still feel my confidence and self esteem is at its low after the way Eva has been behaving/behaved with me. With me making efforts to smooth out the negativeity and her only trying to focus on just the negativitiy.
Well i tired like no man has ever, if she is just showing to me and her self that what she tries to show the outter world as a person into all kinds of philosophical and positive reading and posting on the blog and then goes on to the opposite of what she writes, then for sure she is not really who she portrays herself to be. Even to her self.
and like a fool instead of just ignoring sick people, I tend to get more concerned and want to do good to someone who is just ungrateful for all that I have done and sacrificed. Maybe its because I care too much,,,,, have to learn to care less for such people. But again the argument comes up, they are part of your life and you choose to take a chance. Is it bad on my own character to give up easily?..... or should I be as cold hearted as them?
It surely is affecting my own self-esteem and I am taking in her negative energy and looking at myself as a bad person. When in fact its the other way around, she is the one who is negative and still swimming in all kinds of fake, shallow, superficial show off state of mind.
Sure all her travel is great conversation material and to be made to feel great about it by people who are not into traveling to exotic places. Other than that, how can there be any spiritual growth when the foundation on which one is doing the travel is based on trying to just show off to less fortunate people.
As someone said, its " A real man doesn't love a million girls. He loves one girl in a million ways."
Thats also true to what ever one does, its does not matter how many different places in the world we travel in, as long as we can find happiness in one place, that is what matters. And that one place is within us, not at different places in the world.
So the same thing applies to me, I have to focus on my own happiness instead of trying to feel happy by trying to make someone else happy. All my actions seem to be try to please others and then feel happy if they are happy. And end up pushing my own requirements and happiness to the back.
Have to get back to focusing on my own self, appreciate all the good people with their positive energy and feel better about my own self worth and do good.
7:10 got on the issue of logging on to the test machines with Sweta. was over by 9am.
Got to pay rent, bills, ,,, send mail to vaughn systems.
Got msg from Aji regaring negotiating with Sangi for my leave. Looks like Sep10th is a no go as there is SIT (system integration test) starting for 2 weeks from Sep13. :(
Best possible dates seem to be latter on. need to now check to see flights and climate. don't want to go in any snowy conditions.
Got to decide, is it going to be just spain or just Czech? given evas attitude of treating me like an enemy, don't feel comfortable going there and then having to face the hostile behavior. Rather go alone and enjoy by my own.
around 11:40 got msg from Ajay about going out for dosa at dosa hut :) wanted to go home and get the docs and pay the rent. decicded to go for dosa and latter came back and around 2:10 went home. got the docs.
Send mail to Vaughn about new dates request and sorry for the earlier one on Sep 12.
Back to office and meeting around 3pm-4.
off work after sending in the Expense report and sheets to Prida .. then send fax for the receiptes to be uploaded via the system
Wanted to go out running, but was so lost, fell on to the couch after eating and woke up around 12.
Getting lazy and stressed out about this Euro trip. Had sent out email to Vaughn regarding new possible dates. Have to wait for approval again before making the next move.
Monday, August 30, 2010
Aug 30 Monday,,,, effects of Cheese
Monday, Aug 30 - 2010
---------------------
Had troubled sleep at night with the effects of Cheese-Nachos from yesterday. Guess I am not built for eating cheese. :()
Today with sangi and kris coming back from vacation, I get to know where I stand as regards to the Euro vacation.
got into work around 7:05..... sweta was ready there pinging me, she seemed to be in a happy mood.
8:45 finised showing her the mystries of conf transfer, blind transfer.
Sent out Cogs time sheets. prepared ones for the 15th of next month.
Feeling really bad in the stomach,, so went and got myself Tea and put in lot of lemon in it. Hoping that will break up all the greasy cheese.
Just remember call from balaji and not been able to return his call, should call him today. Was too lost in the beauty of Princeton Univ. to make the call.
Sent msg to Aji reminding him about leave.
Got call from Nar saying about his baby and her acclimatizing to Indian conditions.
Then an heartly talk with anil and during the talk I just completed a in-house course of cogs. got 2 hrs of learning credit in 30 mins hehehe;)
3 to 4 meeting sangi was there. after the meeting went and met Aji again regarding the holidays. But was not able to get any definitive dates. And Sangi saying that System Integration Testing was starting on 13th for 2 weeks. got to see if I can get atleast after that.
Called up malini for salsa and had a blast dancing ... got asked more than asking to dance. especially dancing with Marsha. She is so easy to lead. She kept saying that I should not sit, I should be dancing... hehehe.. I like her encouragement.
---------------------
Had troubled sleep at night with the effects of Cheese-Nachos from yesterday. Guess I am not built for eating cheese. :()
Today with sangi and kris coming back from vacation, I get to know where I stand as regards to the Euro vacation.
got into work around 7:05..... sweta was ready there pinging me, she seemed to be in a happy mood.
8:45 finised showing her the mystries of conf transfer, blind transfer.
Sent out Cogs time sheets. prepared ones for the 15th of next month.
Feeling really bad in the stomach,, so went and got myself Tea and put in lot of lemon in it. Hoping that will break up all the greasy cheese.
Just remember call from balaji and not been able to return his call, should call him today. Was too lost in the beauty of Princeton Univ. to make the call.
Sent msg to Aji reminding him about leave.
Got call from Nar saying about his baby and her acclimatizing to Indian conditions.
Then an heartly talk with anil and during the talk I just completed a in-house course of cogs. got 2 hrs of learning credit in 30 mins hehehe;)
3 to 4 meeting sangi was there. after the meeting went and met Aji again regarding the holidays. But was not able to get any definitive dates. And Sangi saying that System Integration Testing was starting on 13th for 2 weeks. got to see if I can get atleast after that.
Called up malini for salsa and had a blast dancing ... got asked more than asking to dance. especially dancing with Marsha. She is so easy to lead. She kept saying that I should not sit, I should be dancing... hehehe.. I like her encouragement.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Aug 29 2010 , Mountain Lake & Art At Princeton
Sunday, 29th Aug 2010
---------------------
Wake up around 7:30am thinking I am going to be late for the hike in Princeton. Hike is at 10:45am, about an hrs drive, so was okay.
Just have to start off by 9am.
Should be interesting hike as malini told me that she was going to introduce me to Hyderabadi biriyani after the hike.
Would like to go the Alchemist & Barrister with the group for beer and eats after. As it was a nice place and very accommodating, waitress last time we were there.
lets see how it feels as the day progress. Biriyani or European food.
Wow what a day it was... the Great week-ennd
Got to the hiking and was greated by people, obviously they all missed me. :) from last weekend.
awww it was touching.
Reached Princeton University, New Jersey around 10:30 just about the end of gas in my car. It was a very pleasant hike, got talking with Kelly and Mariola from poland.
Then around 2pm we went to the Art Muesuem of Princeton University, had lots of painting and other historical facts and statues from Roman period.
After that we all went to Alchemist and Barristas for Lunch.. was sitting at a table with 4 ladies and they so very educated me on the operas, broadway shows, classics and woooo it was so very intellectually stimulating. Was given advice on what to look out for in Europe,,,so much contradicting Evas stories about Europe or the glossy part she just selectively choose to reveal and criticize all India as been filled with Cheats... damm @#$%^
Then there were a few touching moments with Malini, Sidney sure was happy to see her. She is really a very Classy gal. So full of confidence and very intelligent and worldly knowledgeable.
Got back home around 7pm with my iPhones battery going dead and lossing my way once on the highway. ended up taking 1 north instead of 1 south.
---------------------
Wake up around 7:30am thinking I am going to be late for the hike in Princeton. Hike is at 10:45am, about an hrs drive, so was okay.
Just have to start off by 9am.
Should be interesting hike as malini told me that she was going to introduce me to Hyderabadi biriyani after the hike.
Would like to go the Alchemist & Barrister with the group for beer and eats after. As it was a nice place and very accommodating, waitress last time we were there.
lets see how it feels as the day progress. Biriyani or European food.
Wow what a day it was... the Great week-ennd
Got to the hiking and was greated by people, obviously they all missed me. :) from last weekend.
awww it was touching.
Reached Princeton University, New Jersey around 10:30 just about the end of gas in my car. It was a very pleasant hike, got talking with Kelly and Mariola from poland.
Then around 2pm we went to the Art Muesuem of Princeton University, had lots of painting and other historical facts and statues from Roman period.
After that we all went to Alchemist and Barristas for Lunch.. was sitting at a table with 4 ladies and they so very educated me on the operas, broadway shows, classics and woooo it was so very intellectually stimulating. Was given advice on what to look out for in Europe,,,so much contradicting Evas stories about Europe or the glossy part she just selectively choose to reveal and criticize all India as been filled with Cheats... damm @#$%^
Then there were a few touching moments with Malini, Sidney sure was happy to see her. She is really a very Classy gal. So full of confidence and very intelligent and worldly knowledgeable.
Got back home around 7pm with my iPhones battery going dead and lossing my way once on the highway. ended up taking 1 north instead of 1 south.
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