Wednesday Apr-09-2014
Been a Nobody
And hoping to be loved by - Somebody ...
Is a story for Anybody
who loves - Somebody :)
..
It was interesting to get a 2nd round of interview call . Not sure to be happy about it, as it feels heart breaking to be getting away from Edmon... especially since I so foolishly and in a very out of control way fell head over heals for the girl with the butter fly smile.
If only she knew how much my heart goes all limp and googly everytime I think about her and her smile and her sweet lovely big eyes...
Wednesday, April 9, 2014
Tuesday, April 8, 2014
Apr 08 2014, Sharing and loving
Tuesday, Apr 08 2014.
When one is on a dizzy High by been in love, one tends to think with a open heart and mind of the world been a very loving and wonderful place and everyone is going to be loving, positive and wonderful just like us.
And the reality of the world (or each persons world) is what they try to spread and preach.
When in love, they tend to want to spread the love to every human being they come across, forgive enemies and people who hurt them , love them inspite of all , walk around with a EAR-to-EAR smile.
Happy, happy, happy,,, and spreading happiness and the feeling of happiness as Happiness tends to overflow from the heart over filled with love. Its very contagious. :)
Comparing this with the people who seem to be closed, been secretive, afraid, afraid of others, what others will say or think about them...... These are people or are people going thru not feelings of not having love or feelings of love and greater goodness in themselves that they end up and tend to see the same in other around them.
Even on facebook, one can see that when is in love, people tend to be open and expressive about their feeling and seem to want to spread the goodness to the others around the world.
And those involved in some kind of spooky affairs , that they themselves are not sure (and maybe their inner soul tells them that they are doing something wrong) tend to be overly secretive and try to project to the others some kind of fake projection of what they are going thru and afraid to reveal the real feeling and relations they are having......
The biggest give away about their relationship been screwed up is that they themselves are not sure and are not been true to their Honest feelings and intentions. :)
When one is on a dizzy High by been in love, one tends to think with a open heart and mind of the world been a very loving and wonderful place and everyone is going to be loving, positive and wonderful just like us.
And the reality of the world (or each persons world) is what they try to spread and preach.
When in love, they tend to want to spread the love to every human being they come across, forgive enemies and people who hurt them , love them inspite of all , walk around with a EAR-to-EAR smile.
Happy, happy, happy,,, and spreading happiness and the feeling of happiness as Happiness tends to overflow from the heart over filled with love. Its very contagious. :)
Comparing this with the people who seem to be closed, been secretive, afraid, afraid of others, what others will say or think about them...... These are people or are people going thru not feelings of not having love or feelings of love and greater goodness in themselves that they end up and tend to see the same in other around them.
Even on facebook, one can see that when is in love, people tend to be open and expressive about their feeling and seem to want to spread the goodness to the others around the world.
And those involved in some kind of spooky affairs , that they themselves are not sure (and maybe their inner soul tells them that they are doing something wrong) tend to be overly secretive and try to project to the others some kind of fake projection of what they are going thru and afraid to reveal the real feeling and relations they are having......
The biggest give away about their relationship been screwed up is that they themselves are not sure and are not been true to their Honest feelings and intentions. :)
Sunday, April 6, 2014
Apr 06 2014, Making my heart flutter everywhere
Sunday, Apr 06 2014
Had two interviews last week, one for New york and another for Los Angles ,, east coast to west coast.
And it was another feeling of highs, been with the people of spanish beginner classes.
Except the heart break that caro is moving off to toronto. She is so sincerely sweet and such a wonderful person. Can only feel the honest , nice feeling or sweetness around her. Hopefully her life improves and gets better for her.
And the new teacher from Colm, had seen her at salsa. Well now atleast I know one other person from outside salsa at salsa. :)
Was not a great week for salsa. Funny that I am in the first city where they don't have a regular salsa on a Friday.
But the sunday salsa after not having it last week, should be good. Excited and confused about meeting the smile that I have fallen in love with or in other words, the smile that I have a crush on.
awwww how can a smile be so heart disarmingly disarming , how could it invoke the feeling of happiness in me, how could it make me smile like I am in love and on top of the world.!!!!????
Looking into her eyes and thinking " If only you knew how much I am falling in love with you spirit and your smile"
wonder what she is thinking with that sweet smile, or whats cooking behind that sweet smile.!
The school boy like feeling of excitement, charging up my body and energy levels. Making me smile from ear to ear. Like nothing else in the world matters.
Had two interviews last week, one for New york and another for Los Angles ,, east coast to west coast.
And it was another feeling of highs, been with the people of spanish beginner classes.
Except the heart break that caro is moving off to toronto. She is so sincerely sweet and such a wonderful person. Can only feel the honest , nice feeling or sweetness around her. Hopefully her life improves and gets better for her.
And the new teacher from Colm, had seen her at salsa. Well now atleast I know one other person from outside salsa at salsa. :)
Was not a great week for salsa. Funny that I am in the first city where they don't have a regular salsa on a Friday.
But the sunday salsa after not having it last week, should be good. Excited and confused about meeting the smile that I have fallen in love with or in other words, the smile that I have a crush on.
awwww how can a smile be so heart disarmingly disarming , how could it invoke the feeling of happiness in me, how could it make me smile like I am in love and on top of the world.!!!!????
Looking into her eyes and thinking " If only you knew how much I am falling in love with you spirit and your smile"
wonder what she is thinking with that sweet smile, or whats cooking behind that sweet smile.!
The school boy like feeling of excitement, charging up my body and energy levels. Making me smile from ear to ear. Like nothing else in the world matters.
Monday, March 31, 2014
Mar 31 Monday. End of a Confusing Month... am I in love again?
Monday, Mar 31 2014
Am I in love again, feel so much like a kid to be infatuated by the smile of one person. Like all the walls I built up the past few years cause of the last heart break seems to just melt away.
What a tipsy feeling, just not able to stop thinking about that sweet warm smile that melted my heart. All the signs of one sided love. But what a great feeling to be back with those feelings. Like I could just go on with out food and sleep for ever.
that feeling of liberating a 100,000 butterflies out from my heart, gently floating around me, can't stop smiling.
,,,,, all this inspite of been out of work .
Also another record of having worked for the same company for 4 years. Anniversary.
Wish I could just stay on in Ed and just end up in reciprocal love with her and live the rest of our lives together for ever.
But,,,,, then reality and practicality is another story of pulling me back from the highs of the feeling of love.
Tomorrow starts the next Q2, where will my life take me, where is this all leading on too.
Only time will tell.
It was one of my visions to be living like this in this kind of apartment.. with a view, swimming pool , gym.. well some visions come true, just wished that it was also with someone I love and who loves me.
Am I in love again, feel so much like a kid to be infatuated by the smile of one person. Like all the walls I built up the past few years cause of the last heart break seems to just melt away.
What a tipsy feeling, just not able to stop thinking about that sweet warm smile that melted my heart. All the signs of one sided love. But what a great feeling to be back with those feelings. Like I could just go on with out food and sleep for ever.
that feeling of liberating a 100,000 butterflies out from my heart, gently floating around me, can't stop smiling.
,,,,, all this inspite of been out of work .
Also another record of having worked for the same company for 4 years. Anniversary.
Wish I could just stay on in Ed and just end up in reciprocal love with her and live the rest of our lives together for ever.
But,,,,, then reality and practicality is another story of pulling me back from the highs of the feeling of love.
Tomorrow starts the next Q2, where will my life take me, where is this all leading on too.
Only time will tell.
It was one of my visions to be living like this in this kind of apartment.. with a view, swimming pool , gym.. well some visions come true, just wished that it was also with someone I love and who loves me.
Monday, March 24, 2014
Mar 24 .. Rolling of the project,, next change
Monday, Mar 24 2014
hmmm great start to the week.. get to know that with change in scope requested by the client, I would be off the project.
Just about settling down,, or rather in the process and now this uncertainity.
hmmm great start to the week.. get to know that with change in scope requested by the client, I would be off the project.
Just about settling down,, or rather in the process and now this uncertainity.
Mar 23 . The smile that set butterflies dancing
Sunday Mar 23 2014
Got cooking curry for the first time at the new apartment,,, tasted yummy, then went and got my car washed .. just that now my little apartment smells like curry all over , including me.
went out dancing salsa, again just 10 mins away from home. But suspecting,, forget it,, it is it.. that I am stinking of curry, so tried out perfuming my self before entering .\
Got to dance with the the gal whose smile felt like it made butterflies dance with joy. So sweet, full of innocence . got a name and a bit of back ground... M a Architect from Austria working at drafting in canada ....
Canada oh Canada, how could you be so cruel to highly talented people...
Got cooking curry for the first time at the new apartment,,, tasted yummy, then went and got my car washed .. just that now my little apartment smells like curry all over , including me.
went out dancing salsa, again just 10 mins away from home. But suspecting,, forget it,, it is it.. that I am stinking of curry, so tried out perfuming my self before entering .\
Got to dance with the the gal whose smile felt like it made butterflies dance with joy. So sweet, full of innocence . got a name and a bit of back ground... M a Architect from Austria working at drafting in canada ....
Canada oh Canada, how could you be so cruel to highly talented people...
Saturday, March 22, 2014
Mar-26-2014 Unfaithful
Saturday Mar-26-2014
Was watching the movie Unfaithful on tv.
Reminded about how deceptive, crooked and cunning some women are and then play the victim, with no sense of accountability for their own actions.
They all have the same pattern of behavior when asked about it and not wanting to talk about it when confronted about it and playing the victim and blaming the real victim - the Cheated on.
Was watching the movie Unfaithful on tv.
Reminded about how deceptive, crooked and cunning some women are and then play the victim, with no sense of accountability for their own actions.
They all have the same pattern of behavior when asked about it and not wanting to talk about it when confronted about it and playing the victim and blaming the real victim - the Cheated on.
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