Saturday, Sep 11, 2010
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It was in 2000 Sep 11 I reported for work as to work as a consultant. Meeting Georgia who was very supportive as my manager and who I am still in contact with. Just wish and pray that things get better for her soon.
Went to temple mediated and got my Tirupathi Ventakeshwara ladoos. My fav deserts.
Did not feel like going for a afternoon hike with Malini. Got turned off by some of her sick words, was just reminded of the sickness I had to deal with Eva. Nope not again, no more benefit of doubt, just say bye and focus on my own needs now. As beena said, never compromise on your standards and values.
Just forget the belief that peoples attitude change, yep, maybe. But its not worth the struggle that I have to go thru. Especially when their attitude is hard wired and seems to be beyond the possibility of change.
Selfishness and EGO are just too deeply embedded into people by the time they are adults, its sometimes too much work. Just have to let time pass by and then realize latter like all that happened before. That its good to thank the Universe/God for un-answered prayers.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Friday, September 10, 2010
Sep 10, Friday, 10 years 1st time in NY
Friday, Sep 10 2010
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This was the day, ten years ago, I was first in New Jersey(jersey city) and New York.
Singing What a beautiful day,,,,, :)
Todays forecast ;)
The Moon in Libra trines Neptune and conjuncts Mars tonight, bringing possibilities for romance to the forefront. This is a great opportunity for a date night, as magic is in the air. Falling in love could come easily now and it's easy to get swept off your feet by someone enchanting.
hmmmmm that remains to be seen. will I be able to again meet the gal I had a wonderful time dancing last weekend? She was so sportive and seemed so sincere and down to earth.
Reached work aroun 7:30am. Kind of sems to be a slow day, lets see. I got in a cup of coffee with 3 spoon full of sugar. I am feeling highly charged and optimistic, no one is in the room, its about 8:30. People seem to only come after 9:30 or 10.
now we have a team building lunch set up for every friday afternoon. Self sponsored off course. And no way am I going for sushi or chinese.
Ended up going to Dosa hut and they had the weekend special Hyderabadi Biriyani ,, Dum ka biriyani.... yummyy after such a long time. Last time I had a good biriyani was in Vancouver. Just that this one costed double that of the one in Vancouver. this was 14.30, with tip 16. The biriayani in Vancouvers Al watan was just about 7.89 CAD.
Well this was after such a long time and my first real biriyani in USA.
4:30 got off work, dropped off any at house, went to the bank to see if my visa from them would work in spain. yea,, it turns out that it will. now have to decide on how much Euros I need to take with me.
Around 5:30 get call from malini, was driving back from work. talk for a few then ask her to call after she gets back home to confirm the plan for dinner, she calls back latter and suggests Italian-o. yea well that it is before salsa.
meet at 8pm in downtown, so ask her to call me before she starts from her house. And then we can plan on tomorrows hike.
get to downtown around 8pm. make it to the Italian restaurant. It was BYOB, wow, the first time I am going to a restaurant where they say BYOB. The appetizers were great, the food was okay, also had mussels after a very long time. Used to have that fried at home in kerala... yummyy the friend ones are. ahh now I got it, its called Kal-ma-kai in kerala. as it grows or breads on the rocks. :)
Then out dancing salsa, even thou there were not many people, was able to dance a few with others and malin. Surprisingly evet also turned up there.
-------------------
This was the day, ten years ago, I was first in New Jersey(jersey city) and New York.
Singing What a beautiful day,,,,, :)
Todays forecast ;)
The Moon in Libra trines Neptune and conjuncts Mars tonight, bringing possibilities for romance to the forefront. This is a great opportunity for a date night, as magic is in the air. Falling in love could come easily now and it's easy to get swept off your feet by someone enchanting.
hmmmmm that remains to be seen. will I be able to again meet the gal I had a wonderful time dancing last weekend? She was so sportive and seemed so sincere and down to earth.
Reached work aroun 7:30am. Kind of sems to be a slow day, lets see. I got in a cup of coffee with 3 spoon full of sugar. I am feeling highly charged and optimistic, no one is in the room, its about 8:30. People seem to only come after 9:30 or 10.
now we have a team building lunch set up for every friday afternoon. Self sponsored off course. And no way am I going for sushi or chinese.
Ended up going to Dosa hut and they had the weekend special Hyderabadi Biriyani ,, Dum ka biriyani.... yummyy after such a long time. Last time I had a good biriyani was in Vancouver. Just that this one costed double that of the one in Vancouver. this was 14.30, with tip 16. The biriayani in Vancouvers Al watan was just about 7.89 CAD.
Well this was after such a long time and my first real biriyani in USA.
4:30 got off work, dropped off any at house, went to the bank to see if my visa from them would work in spain. yea,, it turns out that it will. now have to decide on how much Euros I need to take with me.
Around 5:30 get call from malini, was driving back from work. talk for a few then ask her to call after she gets back home to confirm the plan for dinner, she calls back latter and suggests Italian-o. yea well that it is before salsa.
meet at 8pm in downtown, so ask her to call me before she starts from her house. And then we can plan on tomorrows hike.
get to downtown around 8pm. make it to the Italian restaurant. It was BYOB, wow, the first time I am going to a restaurant where they say BYOB. The appetizers were great, the food was okay, also had mussels after a very long time. Used to have that fried at home in kerala... yummyy the friend ones are. ahh now I got it, its called Kal-ma-kai in kerala. as it grows or breads on the rocks. :)
Then out dancing salsa, even thou there were not many people, was able to dance a few with others and malin. Surprisingly evet also turned up there.
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Sep 09, Thursday,
Thursday, Sep 09 2010
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Woke up with the alarm around 5 with just about 2 hrs sleep, switched off the alarm and went to sleep again. woke up with a startl around 6:35, rushed thru the morning stuff and reached office around 7:10am.
ahhh to mid-week salsa. It really burns you off, the last wonderful music I danced to is still playing in my head. :)))))
Still thinking and moved by Malinis offer of cooking for me or treating me to Hyderabadi Biriyani.
Am I feeling the emotions, because of all the sickening treatment I received and been taken for granted for about an year and made to feel that I am not worth anything by Eva . That it iss making me feel overly-grateful to anyone making even the slightest gestures of kindness?
Well atleast it was a selfless gesture from Malini.
And got a few mails from the program people who are from US. Did not get an opportunity to reply to their mails either.
sweta gets her own ip phone connection to help make test calls and transfer calls.
got demo with Li at 11:30 in the war room,
Checking out salsa in Madrid.\
9:15am Went to dunkin doughnuts and had the small egg what ever and a medium coffee. Sent out a reply mail to malini :)
Wish I could openly and sincerely open up my heart and love again, like I was never hurt before, even at salsa when a few girls told me that they liked and enjoyed dancing with, I just froze up and was not able to talk after that.
IT is kind of frustrating to establish some kind of mysterious connection with people and to get scared and freeze up because of the fresh wounds of the hurt.
As much as I wanted to ignore all the hurt and disrespect and been taken for granted and treated like some kind of filthy creature,,, and tried I did to not hold any grudges or anger and establish friendship. But the more I tried the more I was insulted and treated worse.
How long will it be before I really will be able to free myself of the scars of someone else's sickness towards me?
The more I think of it, the more Chakris words seem to sink into me. My own selfish Happiness matter more. And if I had used this approach before, relationship with Eva would not have crossed the 1st month. :).
The signs were all there, just that I allowed myself to compromise and allowed to be taken for granted all in the name of "benefit of doubt" and the foolish Indian thing of compromise. Which does not work with people who are very self-centered. As they think its their birth right to be treated like queens and princess and others are to be taken for granted.
---------------------
Woke up with the alarm around 5 with just about 2 hrs sleep, switched off the alarm and went to sleep again. woke up with a startl around 6:35, rushed thru the morning stuff and reached office around 7:10am.
ahhh to mid-week salsa. It really burns you off, the last wonderful music I danced to is still playing in my head. :)))))
Still thinking and moved by Malinis offer of cooking for me or treating me to Hyderabadi Biriyani.
Am I feeling the emotions, because of all the sickening treatment I received and been taken for granted for about an year and made to feel that I am not worth anything by Eva . That it iss making me feel overly-grateful to anyone making even the slightest gestures of kindness?
Well atleast it was a selfless gesture from Malini.
And got a few mails from the program people who are from US. Did not get an opportunity to reply to their mails either.
sweta gets her own ip phone connection to help make test calls and transfer calls.
got demo with Li at 11:30 in the war room,
Checking out salsa in Madrid.\
9:15am Went to dunkin doughnuts and had the small egg what ever and a medium coffee. Sent out a reply mail to malini :)
Wish I could openly and sincerely open up my heart and love again, like I was never hurt before, even at salsa when a few girls told me that they liked and enjoyed dancing with, I just froze up and was not able to talk after that.
IT is kind of frustrating to establish some kind of mysterious connection with people and to get scared and freeze up because of the fresh wounds of the hurt.
As much as I wanted to ignore all the hurt and disrespect and been taken for granted and treated like some kind of filthy creature,,, and tried I did to not hold any grudges or anger and establish friendship. But the more I tried the more I was insulted and treated worse.
How long will it be before I really will be able to free myself of the scars of someone else's sickness towards me?
The more I think of it, the more Chakris words seem to sink into me. My own selfish Happiness matter more. And if I had used this approach before, relationship with Eva would not have crossed the 1st month. :).
The signs were all there, just that I allowed myself to compromise and allowed to be taken for granted all in the name of "benefit of doubt" and the foolish Indian thing of compromise. Which does not work with people who are very self-centered. As they think its their birth right to be treated like queens and princess and others are to be taken for granted.
Sep 08, lazy day
Wednesday Sep 08 2010
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Woke up lazy and late and reached work around 7:30am,
Kind of slow day.
sweta was online and she seems to log on only around 5 or 6am EST which is around 2:30pm IST. wonder what she is doing during the day time. Then she seems to make one call and then act like she has been working. well what ever,
went for dosa, idly and vada with mirichi baji at Dosa Hut along with Ajay and ano
Then late evening went out salsa dancing.
Was too crowded and did not enjoy much.
Got a mail from malini that she will cook for me meal this weekend or a biryani.... hmmm that is the first time a girl has offered to cook for me. that is touching. If she keeps this sweet and caring behavior up, I might end up falling in love with her. So different and opposite that of previous one.
---------------------
Woke up lazy and late and reached work around 7:30am,
Kind of slow day.
sweta was online and she seems to log on only around 5 or 6am EST which is around 2:30pm IST. wonder what she is doing during the day time. Then she seems to make one call and then act like she has been working. well what ever,
went for dosa, idly and vada with mirichi baji at Dosa Hut along with Ajay and ano
Then late evening went out salsa dancing.
Was too crowded and did not enjoy much.
Got a mail from malini that she will cook for me meal this weekend or a biryani.... hmmm that is the first time a girl has offered to cook for me. that is touching. If she keeps this sweet and caring behavior up, I might end up falling in love with her. So different and opposite that of previous one.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Sep 07, End of long weekend
Tuesday, Sep 07 2010
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End of long weekend, still feels like its monday, but its already Tuesday.
Lots of time spend researching the web on Euro trip. Got to meet a few online. Lets see how that friendship develops, with the help of Vaughan.
Need to iron out the issues with booking room in Madrid, seems to have some issue with the credit card. 3 calls so far and no seems to be able to speak good english. got to call back in one hr that is about 10am my time. That will be like 4pm their time wonder who will be there then?
Around 1pm called up my visa company and was told that all transactions in Spain have been blocked. 7 countries have the block cause of excess fraud by the US govt.
Amex seems to work.
Again towards the evening I get a mail saying that they cancelled my booking and so I ended up booking online with the Amex and got the confirmation after a few mins.
So flight and boarding for one night in Madrid all set plus 5 nights at Soria.... The group seems to be having more women than men, lets see I will get lucky in love here. :)
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End of long weekend, still feels like its monday, but its already Tuesday.
Lots of time spend researching the web on Euro trip. Got to meet a few online. Lets see how that friendship develops, with the help of Vaughan.
Need to iron out the issues with booking room in Madrid, seems to have some issue with the credit card. 3 calls so far and no seems to be able to speak good english. got to call back in one hr that is about 10am my time. That will be like 4pm their time wonder who will be there then?
Around 1pm called up my visa company and was told that all transactions in Spain have been blocked. 7 countries have the block cause of excess fraud by the US govt.
Amex seems to work.
Again towards the evening I get a mail saying that they cancelled my booking and so I ended up booking online with the Amex and got the confirmation after a few mins.
So flight and boarding for one night in Madrid all set plus 5 nights at Soria.... The group seems to be having more women than men, lets see I will get lucky in love here. :)
Monday, September 6, 2010
Sep 06, Labour day hike and Indian buffet
Monday, Sep 06 2010
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Its labour day monday, time to head to chestnut hill and join up with about 43 people who signed up for the hike and Indian food..
So is it the Indian food or the Labor day loneliness thats bringing people to this hike. Sidney is going to freak out. hehehe....
phew a great turn out, a few hot chickas too.
The indian place was closed after the hike and so was other indian restaurants,,,, ended up in whole foods and was not that appitizing to eat pasta.
Got back home by 3pm. ohh well, lets see what salsa at Vango holds for me. maybe I will be there early around 8pm today.
-------------------
Its labour day monday, time to head to chestnut hill and join up with about 43 people who signed up for the hike and Indian food..
So is it the Indian food or the Labor day loneliness thats bringing people to this hike. Sidney is going to freak out. hehehe....
phew a great turn out, a few hot chickas too.
The indian place was closed after the hike and so was other indian restaurants,,,, ended up in whole foods and was not that appitizing to eat pasta.
Got back home by 3pm. ohh well, lets see what salsa at Vango holds for me. maybe I will be there early around 8pm today.
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Sep 05, Sun Day for myself.
Sunday, 05 of Sep 2010
----------------------
Woke up really slowly thinking of things to do. Do I go for a hike of focus on organizing my life and home.
@8:45 decided to stay at home and forget the hike in potts town, maybe go for the hike and Indian food tomorrow.
Started cooking the Chicken curry. need to get milk and to Costco it is.
need to check out the code that ashi helped fix and put it into the server.
cooking felt great with the salsa music playing..... that was a first time.
After costco went to the patel shop and got grated coconunt and a few snacks to eat. Should I take it to europe? 25 days to the trip.. yeaaa
Had lunch around 4pm, watched the Labour day canadian football between Saskatch and winnipeg... winnipeg lost for the 6th year.
Around 7 went to wal mart to check out the back packs. was not really impressed by them. Might as well use my roots bag with shoulder straps.
tempted to book the Euro building. seems logical and better suited, with breakfast thrown in.
Did some reading of the Spanish History. Inteesting to note that the Muslim kingdoms ruled Spain and had their presence till the 1400's
No wonder most of the spanish people have the middle eastern features.
----------------------
Woke up really slowly thinking of things to do. Do I go for a hike of focus on organizing my life and home.
@8:45 decided to stay at home and forget the hike in potts town, maybe go for the hike and Indian food tomorrow.
Started cooking the Chicken curry. need to get milk and to Costco it is.
need to check out the code that ashi helped fix and put it into the server.
cooking felt great with the salsa music playing..... that was a first time.
After costco went to the patel shop and got grated coconunt and a few snacks to eat. Should I take it to europe? 25 days to the trip.. yeaaa
Had lunch around 4pm, watched the Labour day canadian football between Saskatch and winnipeg... winnipeg lost for the 6th year.
Around 7 went to wal mart to check out the back packs. was not really impressed by them. Might as well use my roots bag with shoulder straps.
tempted to book the Euro building. seems logical and better suited, with breakfast thrown in.
Did some reading of the Spanish History. Inteesting to note that the Muslim kingdoms ruled Spain and had their presence till the 1400's
No wonder most of the spanish people have the middle eastern features.
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