Tuesday, May 29 2012
start of a new week and almost end of may.
lets see how this day and week progress, do not feel motivated to get up and doing stuff to get ready.,, that must be laziness creeping in or the hang over from yesterdays dancing in the humid weather.
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
May 28 memorial day
Monday, May 28 2012
again with grand plans for the studies,, and all went to naught.
ended up watching replay of indy 500 and then towards the evening drove to downtown for meditation. and then stayed back for salsa. which was kind of weird with 1 snobbish gal and 13 guys.
atleast towards 11 it got crowded. had a few dances and was kind of hurt not been able to get to han.
again with grand plans for the studies,, and all went to naught.
ended up watching replay of indy 500 and then towards the evening drove to downtown for meditation. and then stayed back for salsa. which was kind of weird with 1 snobbish gal and 13 guys.
atleast towards 11 it got crowded. had a few dances and was kind of hurt not been able to get to han.
Monday, May 28, 2012
May 27 2012 Hiking - Hadrosaurus
Sunday, MAy 27 2012
Went hiking in new jersey, just across the delware river from downtown philadelphia. site of the first find in 1858. 80 million year old bones, mostly intact.
It was a different kind of exp.
nice to see kati again, just not sure, whats going on in her mind.
Went hiking in new jersey, just across the delware river from downtown philadelphia. site of the first find in 1858. 80 million year old bones, mostly intact.
It was a different kind of exp.
nice to see kati again, just not sure, whats going on in her mind.
Saturday, May 26, 2012
May 26 2012, hiking
Saturday, may 26 2012
just about made it to the hike. was nice with about 30 people.
was nice chating with all the older people with their tons of wisdom and life experience.
afternoon got back home and had the goat biriyani. yummm.
evening walking around walmart shopping, was just about feeling lonely and kind of wishing that I has someone special in my life. so many pretty ladies around and so many lovely couples.
then was driving away with a heavy heart when I noticed the full blown orange sun setting. backed up into the parking again and sat there looking at the beauty of sun setting.
Just like many things in my life that ended , maybe for good, maybe missed opportunities, maybe bad decisions, maybe thats life and its destiny.
Tomorrow is a new day, just have to sleep thru the night.
With the weather kind of getting warmer and humidity higher, it was kind of sweaty in the apartment. had to turn on the cooler. :)
luxuries many people in the world cannot even think off.
need to get my focus back and concentrate on learning and improving.
so many options and directions, with no sure end result of victory or it been the right direction. Again, like lot of things in life, its just probablity.
like jeff said on the hike, there are very few women who are really wonderful to be married to. The rest only make your life miserable and then as guys who want to fell appreciated, many guys in bad relationships, where the women try to manipulate and control, the guys try to get their feel of self worth up by ending up cheating on them..... So me like many are not destined to be with some very special gal, who would love me. hahaha,, thinking back,
looks like if I fall for one, its usually a cheating bitch,
lying, insincere and manipulative.
So in the interest of my own happiness its best to just have physical relationships and not get emotionally attached.
just about made it to the hike. was nice with about 30 people.
was nice chating with all the older people with their tons of wisdom and life experience.
afternoon got back home and had the goat biriyani. yummm.
evening walking around walmart shopping, was just about feeling lonely and kind of wishing that I has someone special in my life. so many pretty ladies around and so many lovely couples.
then was driving away with a heavy heart when I noticed the full blown orange sun setting. backed up into the parking again and sat there looking at the beauty of sun setting.
Just like many things in my life that ended , maybe for good, maybe missed opportunities, maybe bad decisions, maybe thats life and its destiny.
Tomorrow is a new day, just have to sleep thru the night.
With the weather kind of getting warmer and humidity higher, it was kind of sweaty in the apartment. had to turn on the cooler. :)
luxuries many people in the world cannot even think off.
need to get my focus back and concentrate on learning and improving.
so many options and directions, with no sure end result of victory or it been the right direction. Again, like lot of things in life, its just probablity.
like jeff said on the hike, there are very few women who are really wonderful to be married to. The rest only make your life miserable and then as guys who want to fell appreciated, many guys in bad relationships, where the women try to manipulate and control, the guys try to get their feel of self worth up by ending up cheating on them..... So me like many are not destined to be with some very special gal, who would love me. hahaha,, thinking back,
looks like if I fall for one, its usually a cheating bitch,
lying, insincere and manipulative.
So in the interest of my own happiness its best to just have physical relationships and not get emotionally attached.
May 25 2012... sleep deprived
Friday, may 25 2012
Sleep deprived with only about 2 hrs sleep.
was good at the salsa yesterday, was flattered by the attention from russian beauty. olg
so sweet and beautiful and looking for my approval, with so many guys chasing her.
anyways,,, after a great night, was sleepy at work and then back home. missed calls from anl
Sleep deprived with only about 2 hrs sleep.
was good at the salsa yesterday, was flattered by the attention from russian beauty. olg
so sweet and beautiful and looking for my approval, with so many guys chasing her.
anyways,,, after a great night, was sleepy at work and then back home. missed calls from anl
Friday, May 25, 2012
May 24 , missed goat
Thursday May 24 2012
casual day, with lots of meeting and surprises.
went out to the casino for salsa, was felling sleeply but sweet olga made me feel special. love her for that.
had gone for goat meat and was late by 5 mins... so ended up getting goat biriyani instead. ate it and was not able to stop myself.. and then at salsa was feeling dammm sleepy.
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
May 23 2012. Still on Fridays high frm dancing
Wednesday, May 23 2012
Still high from Friday nights free form dancing the merengue with Rebaka.
work and then party for san for his promo.
Still high from Friday nights free form dancing the merengue with Rebaka.
work and then party for san for his promo.
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
May 22 2012. tuesday,, what holds todays mystery
Tuesday, May 22 2012
lets see what holds todays mystery
lets see what holds todays mystery
May 21 2012 Meditation and confusion
Monday, May 21 2012
A day so filled with mental dilema and confusion.
went to downtown for meditation secession, its always so wonderful to be among people who seem to have the noblest of intentions and thoughts. more like everyone there with the intentions of goodness.
did not feel motivated to go for salsa just drove back home and crashed into bed.
A day so filled with mental dilema and confusion.
went to downtown for meditation secession, its always so wonderful to be among people who seem to have the noblest of intentions and thoughts. more like everyone there with the intentions of goodness.
did not feel motivated to go for salsa just drove back home and crashed into bed.
Sunday, May 20, 2012
May 20, to hike or not to Hike
Sunday, May 20 2012
To hike or not to hike.
looks like a good crowd and hiking by the river between two states of New Jersey and Pennsylvania.
hmmmm decide in 30 mins.
To hike or not to hike.
looks like a good crowd and hiking by the river between two states of New Jersey and Pennsylvania.
hmmmm decide in 30 mins.
Saturday, May 19, 2012
May 19 2012... hangover..
Saturday. May 19 2012
What a night.,,, and getting out late out of bed.
replied to sa ,,, such a pretty and beautiful lady yet single. atleast I don't have the physical beauty and charm that I could attract gals and explain my been single.
Life sure is funny. the gals I am attracted to seem to be taken. And then the gals I end up with do not value me and take me for granted. I can feel the pain of all the hurt from the past relationships even when I am writing this.
More so because of all the things I went out of the way like a fool do for them and then not been appreciated for all the sacrifices I made, even when I was sick and not showing any signs of it to them, so that their happiness is not jeopardized..... but what do I get,, more selfishness, more of they and their wants are more important than anything.. and then having to put up with their arrogant, selfish displays of anger. ... For sure, I do not deserve a life filled with an angry women traumatizing me at every turn in my daily life.
Would rather be single, happily be not stressed and un attached. :)
Just reminded of the lady making a comment about how Eva was so in her own world and giving me the cold I do not care for you and your interests in the grand canyon cafe. hahaha.. .she just as always displayed boredom when ever I was trying to show her things that interested me. Always about her own interests and wants and hobbies. Did not even have the common cultural courtesy to show respect and it was funny reading about her judgment on the culture and people of India. ahhh always the double talk of the sickeningly selfish self-centered.
What a night.,,, and getting out late out of bed.
replied to sa ,,, such a pretty and beautiful lady yet single. atleast I don't have the physical beauty and charm that I could attract gals and explain my been single.
Life sure is funny. the gals I am attracted to seem to be taken. And then the gals I end up with do not value me and take me for granted. I can feel the pain of all the hurt from the past relationships even when I am writing this.
More so because of all the things I went out of the way like a fool do for them and then not been appreciated for all the sacrifices I made, even when I was sick and not showing any signs of it to them, so that their happiness is not jeopardized..... but what do I get,, more selfishness, more of they and their wants are more important than anything.. and then having to put up with their arrogant, selfish displays of anger. ... For sure, I do not deserve a life filled with an angry women traumatizing me at every turn in my daily life.
Would rather be single, happily be not stressed and un attached. :)
Just reminded of the lady making a comment about how Eva was so in her own world and giving me the cold I do not care for you and your interests in the grand canyon cafe. hahaha.. .she just as always displayed boredom when ever I was trying to show her things that interested me. Always about her own interests and wants and hobbies. Did not even have the common cultural courtesy to show respect and it was funny reading about her judgment on the culture and people of India. ahhh always the double talk of the sickeningly selfish self-centered.
Friday, May 18, 2012
May 18 2012 upset stomach FB ipo
Friday, May 18 2012
feeling under the weather, having upset stomach and the sprain in the right ankle was painful. guess my immune system is in trouble.
so got to see the facebook ipo.... starting up and the. going down.
got to see how it plays in with the hype the coming days.
What a night.,,, had taken the new guy to US - Mann... out to show salsa in downtown.
started off with the beginner classes and he was so out of sync,, felt discouraged and sat out. poor guy.
the crowd was ok, had a few good dances, was feeling a bit arrogant and seems to be working with the gals. They seem to be magnetically attracted to it.
Arrogance, without overstepping and been an arse hole.
Then around 1pm moved to the next club with more hotties.... there was a hot and beautiful gal dancing on the stage.
Got dancing the merengue with rebaka. wow what a night of passionate interlude. The way she bent back wards was amazing. still hypnotized by the way we did it.
The I don't care for you attitude seems to be working.
feeling under the weather, having upset stomach and the sprain in the right ankle was painful. guess my immune system is in trouble.
so got to see the facebook ipo.... starting up and the. going down.
got to see how it plays in with the hype the coming days.
What a night.,,, had taken the new guy to US - Mann... out to show salsa in downtown.
started off with the beginner classes and he was so out of sync,, felt discouraged and sat out. poor guy.
the crowd was ok, had a few good dances, was feeling a bit arrogant and seems to be working with the gals. They seem to be magnetically attracted to it.
Arrogance, without overstepping and been an arse hole.
Then around 1pm moved to the next club with more hotties.... there was a hot and beautiful gal dancing on the stage.
Got dancing the merengue with rebaka. wow what a night of passionate interlude. The way she bent back wards was amazing. still hypnotized by the way we did it.
The I don't care for you attitude seems to be working.
May 17 2012 , long day at work
Thursday, may 17 2012
long day at work, was there from 8am to about 8pm.
got back home and crashed.
long day at work, was there from 8am to about 8pm.
got back home and crashed.
May 16 2012 tango
Wednesday May 16 2012
got out of work around 4:30pm after gettin g at 7:30 for the meeting.
went for tango, only 2couples...the lady i was dancing with, thou was loosing her balance,, towards the end, I think the last 15 mins we clicked and boy oh boy,,, the connection was like having sex,, could hear her breath heavily.... ymmmm I am loving the connections in tango.
got out of work around 4:30pm after gettin g at 7:30 for the meeting.
went for tango, only 2couples...the lady i was dancing with, thou was loosing her balance,, towards the end, I think the last 15 mins we clicked and boy oh boy,,, the connection was like having sex,, could hear her breath heavily.... ymmmm I am loving the connections in tango.
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
May 15 2012, Ja for German
Tuesday, May 15 2012
Start my German immersion.
Ja
kein.
wie geht es dir
wie ist dein Leben
liebe es
hehehehe.. loving it
Start my German immersion.
Ja
kein.
wie geht es dir
wie ist dein Leben
liebe es
hehehehe.. loving it
Monday, May 14, 2012
May 14 2012, German?
Monday, May 14 2012
got reply back from the person I sent my resume too. But his question was, do I know german.
looks like English is going out of favor and its German all the way with the strong economy.
was able to meditate for some. instead of going to downtown to the buddhist temple and salsa after. rather have to try and catch up with sap-related stuff.
got reply back from the person I sent my resume too. But his question was, do I know german.
looks like English is going out of favor and its German all the way with the strong economy.
was able to meditate for some. instead of going to downtown to the buddhist temple and salsa after. rather have to try and catch up with sap-related stuff.
May 13 2012, moms day and back home
Sunday, May 13 2012
spend the morning gardening with nar and fam. Then went out with them to the malaysian restaurant for moms day lunch.
Then towards afternoon got back home with about 2hrs drive.
spend the morning gardening with nar and fam. Then went out with them to the malaysian restaurant for moms day lunch.
Then towards afternoon got back home with about 2hrs drive.
May 12 2012, Temple
Saturday, May 12 2012
Cooked up a few dishes, went to get the fedex package.
Then from there went to temple. from temple to nars house.
spend the night there
Cooked up a few dishes, went to get the fedex package.
Then from there went to temple. from temple to nars house.
spend the night there
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
May 09 2012, missed Tango
Wednesday, May 09 2012
Got to work by 8:10 then saw the mail form us,,, damm again that lady was trying all kinds of short cuts and screwing up my streamlined work. ask her for something and she just complicates it with something else and the try to talk to her about A,, she some how diverts into M and Z... ahhhhh end up making myself cold and stuck to my guns as a professional and said, this is what I want, I am not able to explain more than what I am able to so request you to provide it. End of story.
Also in the proj got to know that the query for the ph no was taking 40 secs to 2 mins to return the values.. when its allowed a max of 2 secs... So thats a huge road block to the proj. with new req.. suggested to ra and ta that in my previous projs we faced this and its cause of in dex in...
now for sure the proj work is going to go on hold cause of that.
The towards evening got out to head to tango , reached there around 6:30,, only after I took a peak did I realise that the class has already begun. not a good feeling after driving for 90 mins and to return back. Well atleast there were no gals I knew so did not feel much loss.
Got to work by 8:10 then saw the mail form us,,, damm again that lady was trying all kinds of short cuts and screwing up my streamlined work. ask her for something and she just complicates it with something else and the try to talk to her about A,, she some how diverts into M and Z... ahhhhh end up making myself cold and stuck to my guns as a professional and said, this is what I want, I am not able to explain more than what I am able to so request you to provide it. End of story.
Also in the proj got to know that the query for the ph no was taking 40 secs to 2 mins to return the values.. when its allowed a max of 2 secs... So thats a huge road block to the proj. with new req.. suggested to ra and ta that in my previous projs we faced this and its cause of in dex in...
now for sure the proj work is going to go on hold cause of that.
The towards evening got out to head to tango , reached there around 6:30,, only after I took a peak did I realise that the class has already begun. not a good feeling after driving for 90 mins and to return back. Well atleast there were no gals I knew so did not feel much loss.
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
May 08 2012,, 13hrs out of home for work
Tuesday, May 08 2012.
got out around 7am and was back from work by 8pm.
kind of getting hectic.
got see dancing with the stars.
got out around 7am and was back from work by 8pm.
kind of getting hectic.
got see dancing with the stars.
Monday, May 7, 2012
May 07 2012, SAP
Monday, May 07 2012
Wish I could have gotten the job in swiss.
been about a few days and that lazy european as usually expected does not even have the courtesy to reply back. Screw all the retarded self proclaimed cultured vagabonds of Europe.
They just know to behave with out any culture , go around the world treating other cultures with dis-respect, thinking that they are superior,, just because they have guns and better weapons,,,
May they be doomed for all the misery they spread around the world.
Weapons and destruction is all they are capable of and keep up their shallow culture.
Wish I could have gotten the job in swiss.
been about a few days and that lazy european as usually expected does not even have the courtesy to reply back. Screw all the retarded self proclaimed cultured vagabonds of Europe.
They just know to behave with out any culture , go around the world treating other cultures with dis-respect, thinking that they are superior,, just because they have guns and better weapons,,,
May they be doomed for all the misery they spread around the world.
Weapons and destruction is all they are capable of and keep up their shallow culture.
Sunday, May 6, 2012
May 06 2012, Sunday musing
Sunday, May 06 2012
got up around 7:40am and got on to the conf bridge for the proj by another group going live.
hmm nice start to a sunday morning working from home.. was intending to go for 3 hr intense meditation ,,, but guess need to attempt that at home.
then go shopping and stock up for the next few months.
The biriyani from Thursday lasted till sat.
called up home and got frustrated talking with dad as he refuses to wear the hearing aid and me ending up repeating the question more than 10 times each time... then like the old cunning guy he is, he tried talking me down and drowning my questions in his monologue,,, got overly frustrated and just hung up the call.
Was thinking about the conversation during yesterdays hikes. About women in general been always angry and bitchy. Atleast the experienced women had the good heart or honesty to admit it. hehehehe and laugh about it.
I was thinking about the women in my life and the people I got to meet. Most of the gals and even many guys who are from eastern european back ground, seem to be more angrier than the other cultures. Its like all they know is to complain about others, the government and everything else and how the others should be doing everything and that they should be just enjoying, drinking and partying and travelling around the world ..... while the rest of the world should be serving them and taking care of their royal wishes.
bunch of sickos.
Is it cause of the influence of communist thinking and mentality? Because I see the same behavior and crapy - bitchy attitude and talk from many people who are into communist ideology in Bengal and Kerala.
But the people from China seem to have a different attitude, all of them seem to want to work their arse off.
No mood to cook.
so got pizza and had it with a class of vodka. watched the amazing race on cbs and wow what a great way to travel around the world. competiting with your partner and solving problems, obstacles and winning a million dollars.
It was interesting to see the couple fight, every ones good and bad side seems to come out when under pressure and for the couples it was inevitablly public fighting and getting angry and what not.
got up around 7:40am and got on to the conf bridge for the proj by another group going live.
hmm nice start to a sunday morning working from home.. was intending to go for 3 hr intense meditation ,,, but guess need to attempt that at home.
then go shopping and stock up for the next few months.
The biriyani from Thursday lasted till sat.
called up home and got frustrated talking with dad as he refuses to wear the hearing aid and me ending up repeating the question more than 10 times each time... then like the old cunning guy he is, he tried talking me down and drowning my questions in his monologue,,, got overly frustrated and just hung up the call.
Was thinking about the conversation during yesterdays hikes. About women in general been always angry and bitchy. Atleast the experienced women had the good heart or honesty to admit it. hehehehe and laugh about it.
I was thinking about the women in my life and the people I got to meet. Most of the gals and even many guys who are from eastern european back ground, seem to be more angrier than the other cultures. Its like all they know is to complain about others, the government and everything else and how the others should be doing everything and that they should be just enjoying, drinking and partying and travelling around the world ..... while the rest of the world should be serving them and taking care of their royal wishes.
bunch of sickos.
Is it cause of the influence of communist thinking and mentality? Because I see the same behavior and crapy - bitchy attitude and talk from many people who are into communist ideology in Bengal and Kerala.
But the people from China seem to have a different attitude, all of them seem to want to work their arse off.
No mood to cook.
so got pizza and had it with a class of vodka. watched the amazing race on cbs and wow what a great way to travel around the world. competiting with your partner and solving problems, obstacles and winning a million dollars.
It was interesting to see the couple fight, every ones good and bad side seems to come out when under pressure and for the couples it was inevitablly public fighting and getting angry and what not.
May 05 2012, Hiking
Saturday, May 05 2012
Got up early, debating to hike or not tooo,, but made it by driving 30 miles and was able to catch up with the group just as they got out and were about to turn a corner... parked and joined them running..
phew,, what a hike,,, got lost many times and then there was this sweet lil turtle behind the jewish temple. ahhh love their sweet innocent face with lines of wisdom all over it.
Got up early, debating to hike or not tooo,, but made it by driving 30 miles and was able to catch up with the group just as they got out and were about to turn a corner... parked and joined them running..
phew,, what a hike,,, got lost many times and then there was this sweet lil turtle behind the jewish temple. ahhh love their sweet innocent face with lines of wisdom all over it.
May 04 2012....Friday.
Friday, May 04 2012
Turned out to be a relaxed day at work. Anls last day at his work too.
tried calling up nar and trying to find out what to take as gift for his new baby gal. running out of ideas. got to go window shopping to see if i can fancy something.
sat out at home trying to catch up on sleep lost for 3 night out dancing.
vodka orange juice with internet youtube with russle peters and jeff dunham with peanut helped get my lungs and face get its exercise.
Turned out to be a relaxed day at work. Anls last day at his work too.
tried calling up nar and trying to find out what to take as gift for his new baby gal. running out of ideas. got to go window shopping to see if i can fancy something.
sat out at home trying to catch up on sleep lost for 3 night out dancing.
vodka orange juice with internet youtube with russle peters and jeff dunham with peanut helped get my lungs and face get its exercise.
Thursday, May 3, 2012
Mar 03 2012, Salsa
Thursday, Mar 03 2012
Salsa date with sha.. she was kind of getting bored at the tango as her level was advanced. lets see how she behaves at the salsa which would be my strong area.
Salsa date with sha.. she was kind of getting bored at the tango as her level was advanced. lets see how she behaves at the salsa which would be my strong area.
May 02 2012, Tango
Wednesday, May 02 2012
went directly after work for tango, paid for the 4 classes.
met this sweetest gal, with amazing curvy body and lovely... best part so easy to dance with.
it would be so great to get someone understanding like her as a partner for anything. unlike the bunch of angry old ladies I got to meet latter at the practice secession.
went directly after work for tango, paid for the 4 classes.
met this sweetest gal, with amazing curvy body and lovely... best part so easy to dance with.
it would be so great to get someone understanding like her as a partner for anything. unlike the bunch of angry old ladies I got to meet latter at the practice secession.
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
May 1 2012,,,,, hectic day at work
Tuesday May 01 2012
Hectic day at work,,
resolve to get into Tango getting stronger.
lets see how I feel on Wednesday.
I must be a real foolish screw ball. too romantically lost in my own world of creating romance when there is none.
Well maybe I am wrong.... maybe its just the way I am, trying to see some kind of big beautiful romance of a flame just when there a splintering sparks.
Damm crazy trick the mind plays or I let it play.
Oh how I wish I could be strong and objective oriented and selfishly focused on my needs than that of others.
Hectic day at work,,
resolve to get into Tango getting stronger.
lets see how I feel on Wednesday.
I must be a real foolish screw ball. too romantically lost in my own world of creating romance when there is none.
Well maybe I am wrong.... maybe its just the way I am, trying to see some kind of big beautiful romance of a flame just when there a splintering sparks.
Damm crazy trick the mind plays or I let it play.
Oh how I wish I could be strong and objective oriented and selfishly focused on my needs than that of others.
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Apr 30 2012. meditation and salsa
Monday, Apr 30 2012
Felt a lot of bad vibration, resulting in very high level of discomfort.
So went to downtown for meditation and then for salsa.
got talking with ven at sanfranscisco... he signed up his daughter in for a medical college in india... costing about 100k initial fee and 20k per annum in yearly fee.. thats like 200k... good god, thats something I could not even dream to have.. and here he is spending on his daughters education. and he has a son who will be following soon.. and this is for education in india. that would be like half a million just in fees.....
Makes me feel so lousy,, no wonder I am without a family. would not be able to support them and pay for their education with my own money, like my dad paid for mine.
Felt a lot of bad vibration, resulting in very high level of discomfort.
So went to downtown for meditation and then for salsa.
got talking with ven at sanfranscisco... he signed up his daughter in for a medical college in india... costing about 100k initial fee and 20k per annum in yearly fee.. thats like 200k... good god, thats something I could not even dream to have.. and here he is spending on his daughters education. and he has a son who will be following soon.. and this is for education in india. that would be like half a million just in fees.....
Makes me feel so lousy,, no wonder I am without a family. would not be able to support them and pay for their education with my own money, like my dad paid for mine.